Stuck at the pump!

[Caspar]

Here's something that may make you laugh!

On my way home last night, I thought I'd do the normal thing and fill my car up with some petrol, ok fair enough... although I hate pumping my car full of expensive fuel...I do it without too much concern... After finishing spending a small fortune I attempted to take the pump nozzle out of my fuel pipe ...and damn!!!! it got stuck!!! the bloody thing just wouldnââ‚Ã⠀šÃ‚¬ÃƒÂ¢Ã¢â‚¬Å¾Ã‚¢t come out!

Ok, what the **** do I do now!!! I started to twist the bloody thing, left right and center! After 10 minutes of this...without understanding what I was doing I went into the petrol station shop and told the kiosk guy. Big queue of people and here's me admitting that my nozzle got stuck in the hole (keep on track people, I'm still talking about my car! ).

He just said "right"!...and started fumbling at papers...useless I thought so I went back out and carried on pulling my pipe.

A guy came out, whom I spoke to in the shop, I think he worked at the garage, in a suit so could have been management. So he came out and started tugging...but to no avail

Ok, I'll phone Vaxuhall Assistance.... just setting the time for you... I lodged the nozzle at about 4.50pm. I phoned Vauxhall at 5.15pm. The lady on the free phone number was really polite and offered to phone anyone for me. (I used the garage's phone cause the freephone number would be charged on my phone ). She told me that the estimate for someone to come out was 6.15-6.30pm ...Blimey, but ok...it's still about an hour. I then had to pay for the fuel as the alarm started to go off behind the counter on his till! After paying and before I started to leave the shop to return to my bondaged car, the kiosk guy asked me if I could move my car!!!!! WTF, do you not understand!....I made a flippant and rude comment to him and walked out!!!

So here I am stuck sitting in my car with a pipe in my arse! I made another vain attempt to pull it outââ‚Âà ‚¬Ãƒâ€šÃ‚¦but got concerned that my pulling would cause a sparkââ‚ƚ¬Ã‚¦so I quickly stopped and got back into my car (after explaining to some local in his F reg escort that my car was stuck! I grabbed a red cone and placed it behind my car to keep me from having to explain again!!!)

My wife turned up, luckily she only works around the corner (I was picking her up), and we went in to buy some comfort food!!! By the time we came out and started to much our embarrassment away the AA guy turned up and saved the day, in the end!

He turned up at 5.37pm, which is 20 minutes or so later which I was impressed by The AA guy was really nice and friendly and admitted in his long years of being with cars heââ‚ ¬ÃƒÂ¢Ã¢â‚¬Å¾Ã‚¢d not seen this problem beforeââ‚Ã⠀šÃ‚¬Ãƒâ€šÃ‚¦.he even admitted he didnââ‚ ¬Ã¢â€žÂ¢t know what he was doing as he poked his metal screw driver down into my fuel pipe!!!! I questioned him doing that, after taking a step back!... He gave me a 101 course in fuel ignition and explosions, which Iâ₠¬ÃƒÆ’¢â€žÂ¢m pleased to say didnââ‚ ¬Ã¢â€žÂ¢t entail any practical examples! He said that since my car drinks diesel it was a safe thing to do. Apparently Diesel is a safe fuel to work with, although he didnââ‚ ¬Ã¢â€žÂ¢t like the smell! A bucket of Diesel would distinguish a light match when dropped into it, apparentlyââ ¡Ãƒâ€šÃ‚¬Ãƒâ€šÃ‚¦tho Iâ₠¬ÃƒÆ’¢â€žÂ¢m not going to try it!

After taking my fuel flap off and taping the surrounding area of the body work up, to prevent scratches, he finally managed to free the pipe!!! Apparently, the notches on the nozzles were caught on the flap (which is supposed to prevent a back drip, if you over fill).

All done and dusted and was pleased to get away at about 6pm



So if anyone saw an idiot on Trafford road Shell petrol station between 5-6pm Monday night, in a Silver Vectra!...it was me!!!!


Moral of this, overly and unnecessary long, story is never put your pipe where youââ‚Âà ‚¬ÃƒÂ¢Ã¢â‚¬Å¾Ã‚¢re not going to get it out.

[KingPhoenix]

Lmao!!! Lmao!! Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Lmao!!

[tkiely]

This reminds me of a story I heard yesterday about a guy I work with who bought some of those push-fit plumbing fittings to use in his new bathroom.

He wondered what would happen if he stuck his finger down the end of one.........and you can guess the rest!!!

[Nemesis]

Go on ... let me move this to Humour

[skyblueheroes]

Dear oh dear. I'd have been mortified.

[Nugget]

I think you qualify as unluckiest bloke in the world for that one matey (although possibly the funniest thing that I've ever heard )

I was once behind a woman at the petrol station who got her key stuck in the petrol cap - not only could she not remove the cap, but she couldn't open her car either. In the end, it took four of us to move her car out of the way for her, while she rang the AA or whoever.

[Ramrod]

I like the bit where you were asked to move your car

[Bifta]

Originally Posted by Caspar

</snip>

Perhaps you should get your mrs. to fill the car up for you in future

[Silent Wings]

Oh that creased me up..............

Maybe you need to go to the phobia thread now and use this

Yep Deisel doesnt burn at atmospheric pressure, unless its heated first.

[Marge]

Originally Posted by Nugget

I was once behind a woman at the petrol station who got her key stuck in the petrol cap - not only could she not remove the cap, but she couldn't open her car either. In the end, it took four of us to move her car out of the way for her, while she rang the AA or whoever.

When I worked at a petrol station this was a regular occurance, always Fords and always women

I ended up keeping a bottle of WD40 behind the till just for this purpose

[Nemesis]

Originally Posted by Debsy42

When I worked at a petrol station this was a regular occurance, always Fords and always women

So you calling Caspar a Woman then ?

/Where's that stirring icon/

[Marge]

Originally Posted by Nemesis

So you calling Caspar a Woman then ?

/Where's that stirring icon/

[Caspar]

Where's that ban button Debs!!!!!

I can laugh now...but it wasn't funny at the time!

You just bought tears to my eyes Caspar