06-01-2021, 11:43
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#1816
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cf.mega poster
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 9,504
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Re: [Merged] Jokes Thread
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09-01-2021, 11:16
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#1817
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Perfect Soldier
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Worthing West Sussex
Age: 63
Services: VM 100M SH3 thingy
in modem mode
XL TV V6 Sony Bravia smart TV and M phone
Posts: 16,493
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Re: [Merged] Jokes Thread
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
__________________
History is much like an endless waltz. The three beats of war, peace and revolution continue on forever.
However history will change with my coronation - Mariemaia Kushrenada
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20-01-2021, 14:10
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#1818
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Perfect Soldier
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Worthing West Sussex
Age: 63
Services: VM 100M SH3 thingy
in modem mode
XL TV V6 Sony Bravia smart TV and M phone
Posts: 16,493
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Re: [Merged] Jokes Thread
Citizen: How do I know that you're a genuine taxman?
Taxman: Pass me a stone.
__________________
History is much like an endless waltz. The three beats of war, peace and revolution continue on forever.
However history will change with my coronation - Mariemaia Kushrenada
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28-01-2021, 09:44
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#1819
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Hic Sunt Dracones
Cable Forum Team
Join Date: Jun 2006
Age: 64
Services: Premiere Collection
Posts: 36,676
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Re: [Merged] Jokes Thread
Joke going around in Russia now:
"The police reported several hundred protesters on Saturday, and a few thousand of them were arrested."
__________________
There is always light.
If only we’re brave enough to see it.
If only we’re brave enough to be it.
If my post is in bold and this colour, it's a Moderator Request.
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01-04-2021, 11:03
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#1820
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cf.mega pornstar
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 16,798
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Re: Jokes Thread
I don't tell many people this but my great grandfather was highly decorated in World War Two, in fact many people think it was the tinsel on his helmet that got him shot
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04-04-2021, 13:13
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#1821
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Mum 15/08/46 - 30/09/20
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Galactic Sector ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha, www.daves-world.co.uk. A secret Moonbase (shh don't tell anybody)
Age: 52
Services: 1 V6, 2x1TB TiVo, SH3. Samsung Galaxy Note 10+ 5G, Ton's of Smart Home stuff, & Cuddy Toy
Posts: 15,989
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Re: Jokes Thread
Me: Doctor I've swallowed my Fountain Pen, what can I do?
Dr: Use a pencil
__________________
STAY AT HOME: I found out that mum will never walk again as the coronavirus attacked her nervous system. She died on September 30th, wearing a mask and she still might be alive today.
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08-04-2021, 11:14
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#1822
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Virgin Media Employee
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Winchester
Services: Staff MyRates
BB: VM XXL
TV: VM XL
Phone : VM XL
Posts: 2,336
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Re: Jokes Thread
I think my rooster is ill...it just laid an egg!
----
PC : I think we can close the Dick Turpin case sarge, we found his hiding place!
Sarge : Where was that?
PC : Highgate Cemetery
(Adapted from The Goons).
__________________
I work for Virgin Media but reply here in my own right. Any help or advice is made as a best effort basis. No comments construe any obligation on VM or its employees.
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