Love and feelings

This one brings out sad feelings.
The theme to 'Titanic'. That's the song we played at my son's funeral. Can't listen to that any more.

Originally Posted by homealone

no - we will not allow you expressing your feelings about her, to be tumbleweed - the dignity you have shown defines you - I am just concerned you feel you need to take up your planned employment, given that your body is already damaged?

Thank-you homealone for you're kind words and concern.

My reason's for my next job are myrid, but while my body is healing (all-be-it with lumps), I feel that the events of this year have left me more damaged in spirit than anything else. The job in Iraq is'nt just for the money, but also rediscovering the person I was, and hopefully getting back my shettered self confidence. I could say more, but this thread is about love, and I still love Maureen as much now as I did on the day of the accident.

[Charlie_Bubble]

I have several songs that remind me of different women from the past. Also some different perfumes that remind me of a couple of them too. Whatever you do, don't rush things. I found someone who I still think of now and know that I should have been more patient. She was just coming out of a divorce and I didn't really understand how she felt and the space she wanted. I pushed it and when she wouldn't move as fast as I wanted, I ended it. Stupid, I'll regret it until the day I shuffle off this mortal coil. I've had 2 serious relationships since then, but neither have been as good and ended after a year or two. Ah well.

[Halcyon]

Thanks for all your replies. Memories of good times do certainly bring back some good feelings of happiness, and maybe sadness too.
But its hanging onto these good memories and feelings that I find most important.

I'm just going to be a good friend and see how each day goes. I know I'l like this girl all my life, but I'm prepared to be happy whatever happens.

However as most of us have discovered, its impossible to just turn off certain feelings as they are with you forever, and you will have feelings for that person forever. Thats how I feel right now, that I will always think highly of her as she is the most beautiful and kind person I've ever met.

Sorry for my ranting on and on. But yeah thats my 2 cents.

[luftys]

Originally Posted by Halcyon

Thanks for all your replies. Memories of good times do certainly bring back some good feelings of happiness, and maybe sadness too.
But its hanging onto these good memories and feelings that I find most important.

I'm just going to be a good friend and see how each day goes. I know I'l like this girl all my life, but I'm prepared to be happy whatever happens.

However as most of us have discovered, its impossible to just turn off certain feelings as they are with you forever, and you will have feelings for that person forever. Thats how I feel right now, that I will always think highly of her as she is the most beautiful and kind person I've ever met.

Sorry for my ranting on and on. But yeah thats my 2 cents.

well good luck to you
even at my age it still the same when someone new comes into your life
Be yourself and be honest,then have Fun Fun Fun

[Chris W]

Go for it. Love always hurts; whether it be because you get rejected or end up splitting up, or just the arguments while you are together that cause pain, love always hurts.

Saying that, if you don't take a chance then you will probably regret it afterwards. You don't have anything to lose.

[Ramrod]

Wicked game by Chris Isaak is 'our' song.......I know it's cheesy but you don't choose these things.

i have songs all through my life that are attached to times in my life. Hearing these songs bring back memories. Its funny really when i reading this thread i heard Cyndi Lauper on the radio, Time after Time and i know this may be weird but it reminds me of picking roses in a field somewhere in Lincolnshire as this was something i did for a few weeks in the summer of 84 i think and this was constantly on the radio.

In terms of approaching someone Halcyon. I've never understood how people can approach someone theye never spoken too and say they have feelings. Surely the first step is to speak, if there are real feelings IMHO you dont have to tell someone, they will know, its called building a relationship.

Im met my wife and the first few times i met her it was with friends, then we did the "lets go to the coast" thing on a sunday and then kept seeing each other at the weekends and on the odd day in the week. In terms or a loving relationship i'd say it was about 6 months before we moved to that point. But hey im not saying this works for everyone but 15 years later were still together and been married 6 years. All i'd say is "Theres no rush"

Originally Posted by gary_580

i have songs all through my life that are attached to times in my life. Hearing these songs bring back memories. Its funny really when i reading this thread i heard Cyndi Lauper on the radio, Time after Time and i know this may be weird but it reminds me of picking roses in a field somewhere in Lincolnshire as this was something i did for a few weeks in the summer of 84 i think and this was constantly on the radio.

In terms of approaching someone Halcyon. I've never understood how people can approach someone theye never spoken too and say they have feelings. Surely the first step is to speak, if there are real feelings IMHO you dont have to tell someone, they will know, its called building a relationship.

Im met my wife and the first few times i met her it was with friends, then we did the "lets go to the coast" thing on a sunday and then kept seeing each other at the weekends and on the odd day in the week. In terms or a loving relationship i'd say it was about 6 months before we moved to that point. But hey im not saying this works for everyone but 15 years later were still together and been married 6 years. All i'd say is "Theres no rush"

Completely agree on all points! Lots of songs mean lots of things to me. While me and mrs towny were 'going out' (a bit of a poor description as I was living in Wirral and she was in Glasgow) she used to make me compilation tapes from her extensive CD collection that I would play in my car. At the time they were a very nice link to her, and spoke volumes as she always chose songs with lyrics in order to send me a message. But I find it painful to hear some of those songs on the radio now, because now we're married and together all the time, they just remind me of a time when we would only see each other for one weekend every 2 or 3 months!

As for taking your time, I couldn't agree more. Mostly our relationship developed by letter, as we used to write to each other a couple of times a week but only saw each other rarely. I think we got a very good foundation in our relationship as a result. If a 'relationship' is based on anything so superficial as physical attraction, then what happens when that person gets old and wrinkly, or, perish the thought, suffers a disfigurement for some reason?

Originally Posted by towny

As for taking your time, I couldn't agree more. Mostly our relationship developed by letter, as we used to write to each other a couple of times a week but only saw each other rarely. I think we got a very good foundation in our relationship as a result. If a 'relationship' is based on anything so superficial as physical attraction, then what happens when that person gets old and wrinkly, or, perish the thought, suffers a disfigurement for some reason?

I forgot about letters too, when the wifety was atr college we used to see each other at the weekends only, but still wrote once a week and clled twice a week. As you say, build a good foundation and the relationship will be stong and wont topple over.

One thing i find funny is people talk about trust and there other halves and a lot of people dont trust there other half. Having gone through the relationship build we went through, we dont even think about trust, its a forgone conclusion that its 100% there and thats important for a relationship to be stable.

Originally Posted by towny

they just remind me of a time when we would only see each other for one weekend every 2 or 3 months!

As for taking your time, I couldn't agree more. Mostly our relationship developed by letter, as we used to write to each other a couple of times a week but only saw each other rarely. I think we got a very good foundation in our relationship as a result. If a 'relationship' is based on anything so superficial as physical attraction, then what happens when that person gets old and wrinkly, or, perish the thought, suffers a disfigurement for some reason?

My relationship with Maureen started in a similar fashon. We had six day's together in Toronto last September. Another 6 days together last December, and seven days together in feburary before tha accident. In between those days we emailed every day, then added in MSN chat sessions, and finally talking on the phone four or five times a week. Those nineteen days together now have to last me for whatever time I have left, but I would'nt change having met and loved Maureen.

[Halcyon]

That really is some great advice there and it is interesting to read how you all got to know people before relationships formed.
May those happy memories stay with you forever.