This is how I do it, I have the Same PDA as you, but I use mine with a Sony Ericsson T610.
Open file explorer and find the file you wish to send, tap and hold on the chosen file until the function menu pops up select beam file and then align your ports, it should then open a window telling you its searching the IR band, and after a few seconds should show the name of your device, leave it a couple of seconds more and it should transfer the file. You may have to allow the transfer on your phone as it requests the transfer.
From what I gather the reason why yours may not have been working is because you where using the recieve beam mode, wich I havent figured out how to do myself yet
Hope that is of some help