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Originally Posted by Hom3r
My niece and R have broken up.
I don't know the full story, but I this R has a lot on her plate.
She move from her hometown of Glasgow, to start a new career and to be close to my niece.
She didnt enjoy her time as cabin crew as she spent more time on stand-by than flying, so she left and got a job which pays £200 more than her rent.
On top of missing her mum, my niece not taking it to well sometimes when R was making her eat and drink, and telling her mum, might taken it toll on her.
But my sister and me will make sure R is ok.
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I'm sorry that your niece and her GF have split up but maybe this could be a blessing as trust is the main thing IMO in any relationship and as you have stated Hom3r your niece has become at times devious and has been caught telling lies, which is not uncommon with an eating disorder.
I can only imagine what your all going through atm and my heart breaks for everyone involved as everyone who has a relationship with your niece atm whether that be a parent, brother, sister or partner sadly more than likely she will tell fibs with saying yes I've eaten this, yes I've drunk this etc The important thing here is to try and remember this is the illness talking not your niece.
The pressure on R must have been tremendous for such a young person in a fairly new relationship and she must have felt at times between a rock and a hard place in what do, does she break her partner's trust and say to the family her concerns or does she keep quiet! It must have been so hard for her also witnessing the person she loves change in so many ways. I think until your niece gets her ED under control, then I'm afraid after watching the Karen Carpenter Story the only relationship that someone under the control of a ED will have is with food
If it was me and my child then I would try and get in a family support group in where I could take their brother's, sister's, Uncle, Aunts etc, keep a diary on what my loved is doing and how the ED is affecting both them and family, speak weekly if need be to my Gp to raise my concerns and worries plus I would not let the person know what I was doing for fear of more secret behaviour.
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Talking to my mum I felt bad in saying "I hope she does get admitted as it could be the best option.
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Don't feel bad as you only want the best for your niece and that is plain to see Hom3r, you need to realise that your not only worried for your niece but also for your sister and in my book that makes you a caring Uncle & Brother
