Thread: Jokes Thread
View Single Post
Old 21-03-2005, 18:37   #15
iadom
Oh Lanky Lanky.
 
iadom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Shaw, Oldham, Lancashire.
Services: 2 V6 running 360. 500mb BB, Phone line, mobile simm.
Posts: 7,956
iadom has a nice shiny stariadom has a nice shiny star
iadom has a nice shiny stariadom has a nice shiny stariadom has a nice shiny stariadom has a nice shiny stariadom has a nice shiny stariadom has a nice shiny stariadom has a nice shiny stariadom has a nice shiny stariadom has a nice shiny stariadom has a nice shiny stariadom has a nice shiny stariadom has a nice shiny star
Re: The Joke Thread (Part 2)

A fleeing Taliban, desperate for water, was plodding through the Afghanistan
desert when he saw something far off in the distance. Hoping to find water,

he walked toward the object, only to find a little old Jewish man sitting at
a card table with neckties laid out on it.

The Arab said, "My thirst is killing me. Please, do you have water?"

The Jew replied, "I have no water. Would you like to buy a tie?

They are only $150. This one goes very nicely with your robes."

The Arab shouted, "Idiot! I do not need your overpriced tie. I need

water!"

"OK," said the old Jew, "it does not matter that you do not want to buy a

tie. I will show you that you have not offended me. If you walk over that

hill to the east for about four miles, you will find a lovely restaurant.

Go! Walk that way! The restaurant has all the water you need!"

The Arab staggered away toward the hill and disappeared. Eight hours later

the Arab came crawling back to the Jewish man's table. The Jew said,

"I told you, the restaurant with the water is about four miles over that

hill.

Could you not find it?"

"I found it," rasped the Arab. "But your brother wouldn't let me in without

a tie"
__________________
BRITIS HOSPITALITY

AN AMERICAN tourist in London decides to skip his tour group and explore

the city on his own. He wanders around, seeing the sights, and

occasionally stopping at a quaint pub to soak up the local culture, chat

with the lads, and have a pint of Guinness. After a while, he finds

himself in a very high-class area... big, stately residences... no pubs,

no shops, no restaurants, and worst of all... NO PUBLIC TOILETS.



He really, really has to go, after all those pints of Guinness. He finds

a narrow side street, with high walls surrounding the adjacent buildings

and decides to use the wall to solve his problem.



As he is unzipping, he is tapped on the shoulder by a London Bobbie, who

says, "I say, sir, you simply cannot do that here, you know."



"I'm very sorry, officer," replies the American, "but I really, really

HAVE TO GO, and I just can't find a public toilet."



"Ah, yes," said the Bobbie, "Just follow me". He leads him to a back

"delivery alley", then along a wall to a gate, which he opens.



"In there," points the Bobbie. "Whiz away SIR, anywhere you want."


The fellow enters and finds himself in the most beautiful garden he has

ever seen. Manicured grass lawns, statuary, fountains, sculptured hedges,


and huge beds of gorgeous flowers, all in perfect bloom. Since he has the



cop's blessing, he unburdens himself and is greatly relieved.



As he goes back through the gate, he says to the Bobbie "That was really

decent of you... is that what you call "British Hospitality?"



"No sir", replied the Bobbie, "that is what we call the French Embassy."
iadom is offline   Reply With Quote