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Gareth · 20-01-2006, 16:51

A Yorkshire man takes his cat to the vet to be neutered. "Is it a tom?" asks the vet. "Nay lad, it's in't box" he replies.

A Glaswegian goes into a cake shop and says to the assistant “Excuse me, is that a macaroon or a meringue?” “No” she says “you’re right, it is a macaroon”

---------- Post added at 16:51 ---------- Previous post was at 15:34 ----------

A farmer in the country has a watermelon patch and upon inspection he discovers that some of the local kids have been helping themselves to a feast.

The farmer thinks of ways to discourage this profit-eating situation. So he puts up a sign that reads: "WARNING! ONE OF THESE WATERMELONS CONTAINS CYANIDE!"

He smiled smugly as he watched the kids run off the next night without eating any of his melons.

The farmer returns to the watermelon patch a week later to discover that none of the watermelons have been eaten, but finds another sign that reads: "NOW THERE ARE TWO!"

20-01-2006, 16:51	#386
Gareth cf.mega poster Join Date: Dec 2003 Age: 50 Posts: 7,101	Re: [Merged] The Joke Thread (Part 2) A Yorkshire man takes his cat to the vet to be neutered. "Is it a tom?" asks the vet. "Nay lad, it's in't box" he replies. A Glaswegian goes into a cake shop and says to the assistant “Excuse me, is that a macaroon or a meringue?” “No” she says “you’re right, it is a macaroon” ---------- Post added at 16:51 ---------- Previous post was at 15:34 ---------- A farmer in the country has a watermelon patch and upon inspection he discovers that some of the local kids have been helping themselves to a feast. The farmer thinks of ways to discourage this profit-eating situation. So he puts up a sign that reads: "WARNING! ONE OF THESE WATERMELONS CONTAINS CYANIDE!" He smiled smugly as he watched the kids run off the next night without eating any of his melons. The farmer returns to the watermelon patch a week later to discover that none of the watermelons have been eaten, but finds another sign that reads: "NOW THERE ARE TWO!"