A husband says to his wife,
"darling what would you do if I won the National Lottery?"
She replied, "I'd take half, then leave you you miserable git."
He replies "oh really- well you'll never guess what??"
"You've actually won - oh my god - how much" she replies excitedly.
To which he then says - "ten quid - here's a fiver - now **** off!"
Si thee