In a pub quiz the other day I lost by two points. One question was where do women mostly have curly hair? - Apparently, it's Africa!
The other question was to name two things commonly found in cells, could have sworn that Scousers and Pikeys was the correct answer!
I've heard that Apple have scrapped their plans for the new childrens iPod after realising that iTouch Kids is not a good product name.
George Clooney is to star in a new film about Gary Glitter, called "Oh, She's Eleven."
The wife told me I was no longer romantic so I booked a table for the two of us on Valentine's Night. Problem was she's rubbish at snooker!
There's a new Muslim clothing shop opened in Hartlepool but I've been banned from it after asking to look at some bomber jackets!
Jonathan Ross has been accused of shoplifting a kitchen utensil from Tesco. Ross said "although I had enough money on me at the time, it was a whisk I was prepared to take".
Scientists have revealed today that they have found a new drug for depressed lesbians. It's called Trydixagen.
That's enough for now, sigh............................................!
Si thee
