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**Hugh** · 17-05-2010, 18:45

Three couples, an elderly couple, a middle-aged couple and a young newly-wed couple wanted to join a church.

The vicar said, "We have special requirements for new parishioners. You must abstain from having sex for two weeks."

The couples agreed and came back at the end of two weeks.

The vicar went to the elderly couple and asked, "Were you able to abstain from sex for the two weeks?"

The old man replied, "No problem at all, Pastor."

"Congratulations! Welcome to the church!" said the vicar.

The vicar went to the middle-aged couple and asked, "Well, were you able to abstain from sex for the two weeks?"

The man replied, "The first week was not too bad. The second week I had to sleep on the couch for a couple of nights but, yes, we made it."

"Congratulations! Welcome to the church!" said the vicar.

The vicar then went to the newly-wed couple and asked, "Well, were you able to abstain from sex for two weeks?"

"No, Vicar, we were not able to go without sex for the two weeks," the young man replied sadly.

What happened?" inquired the vicar.

"My wife was reaching for a can of paint on the top shelf and dropped it. When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and took advantage of her right there."

"You understand, of course, this means you will not be welcome in our church," stated the vicar.

"We know," said the young man, "We're not welcome at Homebase any more either."

17-05-2010, 18:45	#1419
Hugh laeva recumbens anguis Cable Forum Team Join Date: Jun 2006 Age: 68 Services: Premiere Collection Posts: 43,620	Re: [Merged] Jokes Thread Three couples, an elderly couple, a middle-aged couple and a young newly-wed couple wanted to join a church. The vicar said, "We have special requirements for new parishioners. You must abstain from having sex for two weeks." The couples agreed and came back at the end of two weeks. The vicar went to the elderly couple and asked, "Were you able to abstain from sex for the two weeks?" The old man replied, "No problem at all, Pastor." "Congratulations! Welcome to the church!" said the vicar. The vicar went to the middle-aged couple and asked, "Well, were you able to abstain from sex for the two weeks?" The man replied, "The first week was not too bad. The second week I had to sleep on the couch for a couple of nights but, yes, we made it." "Congratulations! Welcome to the church!" said the vicar. The vicar then went to the newly-wed couple and asked, "Well, were you able to abstain from sex for two weeks?" "No, Vicar, we were not able to go without sex for the two weeks," the young man replied sadly. What happened?" inquired the vicar. "My wife was reaching for a can of paint on the top shelf and dropped it. When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and took advantage of her right there." "You understand, of course, this means you will not be welcome in our church," stated the vicar. "We know," said the young man, "We're not welcome at Homebase any more either." __________________ Thank you for calling the Abyss. If you have called to scream, please press 1 to be transferred to the Void, or press 2 to begin your stare. If my post is in bold and this colour, it's a Moderator Request.