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Osem · 31-08-2009, 10:34

I can' speak for anyone else and don't expect those not in a sitituation like ours to understand but I can say that when we've filled out the DLA forms we've always found it a very painful and emotionally draining experience, made worse by the fact that we're acting on behalf of our child and therefore responsible for securing an entitlement he will come to rely on in time.

Describing in great (often repetitious), graphic, detail all the physical/mental problems and limitations of a vulnerable loved one is an extremely depressing and taxing affair. As parents of a disabled child we try to remain positive at all times, knowing full well that if we can't look after him the only option will be him being taken into care - something which fills us with dread! At the same time however, documenting all the things we have to deal with on a daily basis is extremely depressing and upsetting. It also forces you to acknowledge all those painful emotional issues and realities you try to bury deep inside the back of your mind in order to make the load bearable. I'll be honest and say that at times we've both felt we'd be unable to cope with his needs as he grows up... That's a horrendous thought believe me!

When we go to see his paediatrician we see a file several inches thick, full of test results, medical reports/correspondence relating to all his problems. These problems are not the subject of debate, they are medical fact! His annual school reviews are the same - there is no doubt about the extent of his needs. His whole life seems to have been a series of serious medical and other problems and when we can bear to think about it we know that what the future holds is more of the same. Frankly, living with this sort of thing is hard enough without having to fill out onerous DLA forms which greatly test the will of genuine claimants like us and make us feel we're fighting to justify what little help our loved ones get. Frankly we often feel like we can't carry on fighting but we have no choice do we....

In any system of welfare there will be those who cynically and selfishly abuse that system. People like us aren't asking for carte blanche to do and claim what we want, we're just asking not to have our considerable burden added to and not to be made to feel like we're spongers, having to justify everything - as if there was any doubt about the numerous problems we already have to live through and cope with.....

31-08-2009, 10:34	#121
Osem Inactive Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Right here! Posts: 22,315	Re: disability living allowance I can' speak for anyone else and don't expect those not in a sitituation like ours to understand but I can say that when we've filled out the DLA forms we've always found it a very painful and emotionally draining experience, made worse by the fact that we're acting on behalf of our child and therefore responsible for securing an entitlement he will come to rely on in time. Describing in great (often repetitious), graphic, detail all the physical/mental problems and limitations of a vulnerable loved one is an extremely depressing and taxing affair. As parents of a disabled child we try to remain positive at all times, knowing full well that if we can't look after him the only option will be him being taken into care - something which fills us with dread! At the same time however, documenting all the things we have to deal with on a daily basis is extremely depressing and upsetting. It also forces you to acknowledge all those painful emotional issues and realities you try to bury deep inside the back of your mind in order to make the load bearable. I'll be honest and say that at times we've both felt we'd be unable to cope with his needs as he grows up... That's a horrendous thought believe me! When we go to see his paediatrician we see a file several inches thick, full of test results, medical reports/correspondence relating to all his problems. These problems are not the subject of debate, they are medical fact! His annual school reviews are the same - there is no doubt about the extent of his needs. His whole life seems to have been a series of serious medical and other problems and when we can bear to think about it we know that what the future holds is more of the same. Frankly, living with this sort of thing is hard enough without having to fill out onerous DLA forms which greatly test the will of genuine claimants like us and make us feel we're fighting to justify what little help our loved ones get. Frankly we often feel like we can't carry on fighting but we have no choice do we.... In any system of welfare there will be those who cynically and selfishly abuse that system. People like us aren't asking for carte blanche to do and claim what we want, we're just asking not to have our considerable burden added to and not to be made to feel like we're spongers, having to justify everything - as if there was any doubt about the numerous problems we already have to live through and cope with.....