[sherer]

A Scotsman, an Italian, and an Irishman are in a bar. They are having a good time and all agree that the bar is a nice place.

"Aye, this is a nice bar," the Scotsman says, "but where I come from, back in Glasgee, there's a better one. At MacDougal's, ye buy a drink, ye buy another drink, and MacDougal himself will buy yir third drink!"

The others agree that sounds like a good place.

Then the Italian says, "Si, dat's a nice-a bar, but where I-a come from, dere's a better one.
In-a Roma, dere's-a dis place, Vincenzo's. You buy a drinka, Vincenzo buys you a drinka. You buy anudda drinka, Vincenzo buys you anudda drinka."

Everyone agrees that sounds like a great bar.

Then the Irishman says, "You tink dat's great? Where Oi come from in Dublin, dere's dis place called Murphy's. At Murphy's, they boi you yer first drink, dey boi you yer second drink, den dey boi you yer tird drink, and den, after all dat, dey take you out de back and get you laid!"

"Wow!" the other two exclaim. "That's fantastic! Did that actually happen to you?"

"No", the Irishman says, "but it happened to me sister".