[jellybaby]

A husband walks into Victoria's Secret to purchase some sheer lingerie

For his wife. He is shown several items that range from $250 to $500. The more sheer, the more expensive. He opts for the most sheer item, pays the $500 and takes the lingerie home.

He presents it to his wife and asks her to go upstairs, put it on and model it for him.

Upstairs, the wife thinks, "I have an idea. It's so sheer that it might as well be nothing. I won't put it on, but I'll do the modeling naked, return it tomorrow and keep the $500 refund for myself."

So she appears naked on the balcony and strikes a pose. Her husband says, "Good Lord! You'd think that for $500 they'd at least iron it!"

He never heard the shot.

Funeral is Friday.