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Originally Posted by Xaccers
They learn that a slap is the punishment for doing something wrong.
They *are* able to diferenciate that from just thumping someone.
Young children have an excellent handle on the core of justice.
That's why kids are so good at running to their parents to tell on their siblings.
They know their siblings have done something wrong, and they've leant that their parents are the ones to handle the punishment.
This teaches them to respect authority.
If John locks someone else away against their will, should John not be locked away for doing wrong?
Or should you just reason with him, get him to say "yes, I understand what I did was wrong, I'm sorry, I won't do it again" and let him go?
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My original post was a very a small one so there was no need for you to snip portions out in the quote. If you think your argument is that strong then there should be no need for you to falsely lessen the impact of mine in this way.
Yes children do learn that a slap means that they have done something wrong. Wouldn't you rather not have to slap them at all and get an even better result (especially the child not crying his/her eyes out and hating you even just for a short time)? Also, with positive discipline there is a certain amount of self-learning and general improvement in attitude so that you lessen the chance of other offences occuring for which you would still have to smack for. Specific reactionary physical punishment is just a series of smacks for specific brands of naughtiness throughout each stage of development until eventually they are too old to be smacked.
Doing things more positively does not mean talking to the child in the fashion of an old hippy cliche after the event. It involves getting more involved with them using all of the time you can spare. If you really wanted to you could read about it, learn and try it out.
Anyway, I am one of the old f*ckers around here. Traditionally I am supposed to be the type that says, "bring back the birch" and all that stuff. If even I can realise that there is a more rewarding way then maybe you should give it some genuine thought.