Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Flubflow
Here is a useful link peeps....
http://www.early-education.org.uk/1leaflet16.htm
If, after reading and applying all that, any parent *still* feels that smacking their child is a good idea then further expert help is probably needed for the parent and/or child. |
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by that link
The dangers of smacking
Young children learn best by copying, so it is no surprise that smacking teaches children to behave aggressively. Parents who smack their children will find that the effect wears off very quickly and their children will become gradually more and more difficult to manage.
|
If that was the case, then society would have gone from a more violent people to less violent people as parents moved away from spanking.
So how does it explain the increase in violent crimes?
From my experience, as a child, being with children, and being with parents shows that statement to not be the case.
For instance, one couple I know are teachers at a school for disruptive teenagers, they are able to use restraining forces to subdue any aggressive pupils. It works, the kids learn that they are not able to get away with being disruptive and eventually give up.
However, at home, they've never used more than reasoning with their children, as such, their children know that they can get away with anything as all that their parents will do is say "now, I don't think that's very good of you", kid thinks "ooo big deal, I want to do it, you're not stopping me, so I'm going to do what I like"
When kids need to learn what is right and wrong, they're too young to understand reasoning, but they are able to understand that if they do something and it hurts them, then they won't do it again.
Associating this with the word "no" means that as the child develops, it associates being told no with the slap, and realises that if it responds to the no, it won't get a slap.
The problem comes when the child reaches about 6-7 when they develope a stronger sense of themselves, and will try and push the no limit to see if it is still in effect. If the parent doesn't re-affirm this limit, then the work is undone and the child then learns that the parent no longer has power. Such a situation is like when you see a parent saing "I'm going to count to 3, 1, 2, 2 and a bit" and then not following through with the punishment.