The offside rule explained for women
 

Not sure if this should be here or in the Humour section, but here goes anyway...

You're in a shoe shop, second in the queue for the till. Behind the shop assistant on the till is a pair of shoes which you have seen and which you must have.

The female shopper in front of you has seen them also and is eyeing them with desire.

Both of you have forgotten your purses.

It would be totally rude to push in front of the first woman if you had no money to pay for the shoes.

The shop assistant remains at the till waiting.

Your friend is trying on another pair of shoes at the back of the shop and sees your dilemma.

She prepares to throw her purse to you.

If she does so, you can catch the purse, then walk round the other shopper and buy the shoes.

At a pinch she could throw the purse ahead of the other shopper and, *whilst it is in flight* you could nip around the other shopper, catch the purse and buy the shoes.

Always remembering that until the purse had *actually been thrown* it would be plain wrong to be forward of the other shopper.

Dear Girls - you have just learned the offside rule

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

:rolleyes:

Dad taught me when I was old enough to learn it :p:

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Yeah, but that was only yesterday ;) :p:

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Don't be silly Nugget, it was this lunchtime.

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Nugget, I'd put that asbestos suit on stand by if I was you:D

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Hmmm, Nugget & nffc :redcard:

...Havent you two got better things to do like being off somewhere playing with your conkers ;)

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Oh balls...

/whips

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Don't be silly - I've been living with Mrs Nug for 5½ years. She took my conkers off me ages ago :erm: :D

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Ellie, didn't you know that Nugget's real surname is Bobbit :Yikes:

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

now, can you send this to the Linesman Association so they can learn it too

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

:tiptoe:

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

OK, who had 2 days before Incog would relent and post in the sports forum in the CF sweeps? You get a CF goodie bag :)

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Football is like Yorkie bars.......Not for girls.


Have you noticed how boring the match is now its a family thing?
And when the girls run on the pitch baring their fantastic spheres they get banned from the ground!!!!

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Better... ;)

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Anyone who mentions women,and the offside rule in football will get my attention.

Mind forget anything do do with explaining the rules of cricket..hubby has been trying for 35 years...:p: ;)

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Now now Coggy, be fair - the way you talk, your hubby's been trying for at lot longer than 35 years ;) :D

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Actually I didn't really need the offside rule explained.What I really want to know is WHY have an offside rule?:shrug:

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Funny how "Bobbitt" has almost become a verb......[snip]

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

To stop the attacking players from staying forward and goal hanging.

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Thank you.:)

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Never stopped Ian Wright though ;)

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Meowwwww !! :rofl:

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

dont you mean nearly any1 in the English squad....other then Rooney the Terror ;)

oww okay I can name another dutchie as well .... Ruud van Nistelrooy

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Pretty pointless when you see my passing skills... :)

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

:omg: mister nffc ..you're living dangerously now ;)

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Ooh, I like the sound of that :LOL: wonder what she means

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

You'll keep :afire: (and then you'll find out) ;)

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

lol ..why the pussy? ;)

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

That's what I left for you to interpret... btw, who's that palar*e player in your profile?

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

It's Dougie Freedman :)


And, Hmmm? I guess you're trying to tell me that you're a big pussy? :shrug:

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Nah, he means he's now shown you his...etc ;)

Re: The offside rule explained for women
 

Thought he looked familiar. He played for us once :erm:

[meeeow.]