Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

I saw this interesting current affairs programme last night and thought it would be helpgul & useful for those who find it hard to come to terms with the fact that some people have hidden disabilities.

It's important to educate and inform those who don't believe that such a thing exists or that people are using their conditions as excuses for various things.

It's hard to believe, but some people have actually been made out to be liars or had their disability challenged!

https://www.itv.com/hub/tonight/1a2803a9316

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

Another pot kettle black jobbie post. Oh the irony.

I find it strange you find it 'hard to believe' in this day and age where it seems to be the norm for others to get annoyed when a top of the range 4x4 parks in a disabled spot with a Blue Badge. Or challenged when someone comes out of a disabled toilet walking and not in a wheelchair. Things like that aren't helped when you can buy Radar keys from Argos, Amazon or Ebay etc. At least the the disabled logo's on the loo doors are changing which is a big help.

Some of the worse offenders / complainers I've come across are those that are disabled themselves, like they are or should be treated with some kind of superiority over others.

Still other people's ignorance is their invisible disability, and if they want to challenge me, I won't take offence, I just find it funny.

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

We had a session on vocab to use and one big no-no I do remember is that not to use "disabled toilet" - the toilet is not disabled.
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In some places I use the wheelchair/accessible toilet at the moment because I need to use a catheter to urinate and these units have more space and a sink next to the toilet. I wouldn't use them if someone who really needed it was waiting though.

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

I'm sure that I have a couple of hidden disabilities, the most obvious one seems to be not suffering fools gladly.
I've tried for years to cope with this but to no avail, as I then get quite annoyed at myself for having to refrain from telling the truth so I don't upset people and hurt their feelings.

Being quite direct, open and honest (opinionated? ) is also something I suffer from . . or is that the same as the first? . . anyway, whatever it is it means some people think twice about asking me questions because they've found - from experience - they might not like the answer. Others seek my advice because they know they'll get a straight answer, no beating around the bush, lump it or like it that's how it is.

Am I a bad person? No.
Am I different to the masses? Yes.
Does it cause concern to others? Yes.
Does it cause concern to me? . . . what do you think :D

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

Our son's college registered him with a charity, which, like many, only exists to generate income to keep themselves open, and their staff paid.

As expected, the only contact he had with the charity for over a year were strongly-worded requests for him to chug in streets and outside supermarkets, or go door-to-door asking for donations direct from bank accounts.

They would provide a tabard, an ID card, collection box and/or a donations pad. No help with transport, and he had to collect the items himself, and return them at the end of each day's activity.

Then out-of-the-blue came a request from them to support a movement to have the word "disability" stricken from the English vocabulary, to be replaced with "otherly able".

I remember when "handicapped" was pushed further and further out of use. The change made no difference.

Then another request to design a replacement logo to replace the "person in a wheelchair" one that adorns parking spaces, toilets for the disabled, etc. The charity wanted to address the "hidden disability" question.

How did this help with his condition?

The pandemic brought "hidden disabilities" to the fore in some places. A company designed and then sold the "Sunflower lanyards" to shops, who would then give them free to people who could not wear masks. This would indicate their "hidden disability". A nice little earner for the company behind the masks (no pun intended).

But then anti-maskers found copies of these lanyards online, so it all became a farce.

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

Who ?

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

Which point in particular?

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

I agree, which point?

People should acknowledge their hidden disabilities? Do that mean you should ask someone if they have a hidden disability or does that just mean you should learn to just 'mind your own business'?

Personally I don't see why I should justify myself to others just because they get 'upset' over something. It's their problem not mine and I don't get offended by it either. It's how you deal with is the key.

Nothing will change anyway, those with that kind of attitude will always challenge others based on what they see, you just have have a thicker skin and ignore them.

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

Because it effects your relationship with others it would likely be a condition. Do you like to have control also? as in need people to be on time and need to plan your day out quite rigidly ?

in 2019 I self-referred to IAPT and was referred to a course of CBT. I pretty much like you am quite opinionated and blunt and like you it effected my relationship with others. I also suffer from clinical anxiety and have done most of my life due exacerbated by minor brain damage that occurred when I had encephalitis as a child.

The CBT bought out a control issue I had no idea I had, I need people to be on time I hate tardiness and I need to know what is happening around me. The CBT helped me a lot, I am not cured but I deal with things a lot better

I do think mental illnesses are cover the majority of hidden disabilities and those who have not suffered with similar have absolutely no idea just how debilitating they can be

---------- Post added at 15:14 ---------- Previous post was at 15:13 ----------

I think the "mind your own business" is the one that needs following.

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

I do tend to agree.

Yes saying things that you know full well will upset other people and having no care or empathy about it is a sign of a mental illness/disability.

These are often the traits of Aspergers Syndrome or autism. It can run in families and there are many cases of it now being picked up in the parents when their children receive a diagnosis.

It's a crying shame that so many lives/relationships have been affected or even ruined before it was tested for.

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

I'm genuinely not - he makes multiple points and I'm not a mind-reader.

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

Ummm ...

You find it odd that people question a 'hidden' disability :confused:

You do know the meaning of hidden, right ?

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

Ideally people would either ignore someone say for example walking out of a disabled toilet or parking in a disabled zone, but if they cannot ignore maybe ask first why the person is using it instead of shouting and ranting etc. I know that is asking too much for people to have a degree of politeness in this day and age though

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

Well I don't find it hard to come to terms with people that have hidden disabilities. Hidden disabilities is not a new thing but people's attitudes seems to have gotten worse.

What I do have a gripe with is those with disabilities hidden or not that have a sense of entitlement and go to great lengths just to make a point.

It's not the fact that others might not believe him, more of how often he brings it up and makes an issue of it instead of just moving on. Should we make allowances or treat him differently if he can't accept things on a forum?

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

Have you ever thought he might respond the way he does due to his hidden disability or are you happy to judge him anyway ???

You telling him to move on is like someone telling a depressed person to pull themselves together

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

That is a leap. Move on meaning instead of making a rod for your own back.

As for judging, I take him as face value like everyone else. Wind your neck in, lol.

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

I see . . . so I have to live my life lying to people because they can't handle the truth?

PS . . where do I apply for my payments

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

Yes, he made a point which was completely wrong. But now you state it's about tolerance and now even yourself has accused me of not having any, also proves you're wrong too and you're judging me wrongly on a mistakenly taken post.

As for tolerance and understanding, yes there should be some when brought to attention but should also work both ways too.

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

Why should I have a go at you or anyone for that matter? I'd rather keep this on topic.

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

Neck is not wound out just engaging in a discussion.

It is not a leap at all. "Move on meaning instead of making a rod for your own back" people with certain mental health issues have little or no control over them. Some rely on medication. I do not know what condition Richard has or how it effects his life.

Ironically you say you take everyone at face value which is the point of this whole thread of course and not understanding hidden disabilities.

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

If someone informs you that they have a hidden disability, this should be accepted as opposed to, by fault or design, people making things worse by questioning or judging. The programme explains it all.

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

cannot handle your truth which could well not be the truth at all

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

Ok, I agree to disagree, not worth going over it.

The title of this thread is 'Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.' Watching a 30 minute program about it won't change anything or anyone. It's human nature to question something that doesn't look right. Dealing with it is something I / we have to live with. Whether you argue with someone or just ignore them, the main thing is for me is to not make it or take it personally. For some that could be a problem that could be helped with.

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.
 

lol

Q: Does my bum look big in this?
A: Yep, sure does

OR


Q: Does my bum look big in this?
A: No it looks ok
Q: Are you sure?
A: Yes it looks fine, honestly
Q: You're not just saying that to make me feel nice?
A: No, it definitely suits you
Q: Well . . when I looked in the mirror I thought it looked bad
A: It looks fine to me, honestly
Q: I'm going to change, it looks awful . .
A: Go and get changed then
Q: So it DOES make my bum look big, I knew it *cry* *sob*

Re: Help for those with little or no understanding of hidden disabilities.