Drink binge mother left children
 

Source - http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/l...re/8362815.stm

I can't believe people like this are allowed to have kids, let alone keep the ones they have.

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

So she neglected them for 25 hours, and was found 37 hours after by one of the fathers.
the sad thing about it is knowing that the children were hungry, and she got away with it.

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

Moronic **** like this so deserve forced sterilisation....

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

Well she is probably an alchoholic and a drug addict. Once she got going she probably forgot she ever had any children. It is a sad state of affairs but is certainly not a new phenomenom. :(

It's nice to hear the children are now being cared for by the Grandparents instead of being taken into care or fostered. Hopefully they are now better off.

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

I wonder if she had been in a tapas bar whether she would have been prosecuted....

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

Probably. I don't think child neglect is judged on a class basis, which is what I believe you're alluding to.

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

Now if she left a dog in the car on a hot day she would get jail time, sorry if thats a bad example.

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

Wasn't there a case a while back involving children being neglected whilst the parents enjoyed the ambience of a tapas bar? In that case something did happen to one of the children but I don't recall any prosecution.

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

I thought he was alluding to the Madaline Mcann scenario.

DO YOU REALLY THINK A SINGLE (ANY) MOTHER (Parent
 

`ve read/heard about Rebecca who walked out on her kids. I`ve heard Rebecca is bad and all but what i have not heard in the reports is any information at all about her circumstances wahtsoever. And I would have liked to hear that.
- How on earth does she cope with four under fives??? What support does she have?..
My experience of motherhood has taught me that raising any one child under 1 is often a job for more that just one person. It also showed me just how ununderstanding about that our culture is, with any lack of extended family/community support whatsoever.
Her youngest is only three mths, so there is every possibility of extreme mental and physical exhaustion or even postnatal depression, for example. Has anyone asked?!!!
DO YOU REALLY THINK A SINGLE (ANY) MOTHER (Parent)WALKING OUT ON HER KIDS CAN EVER BE ABOUT HAVING FUN???

There is another way of looking at it: This woman is a hero every day of her life. And that day, she wasn`t.

I`d like to ask everyone else who so easily feels judgmental: `How much do you know about sleep deprivation? How much do you know about parenting at all...? Single parenting?

Whatever has lead that woman to her current circumstances, they are what they are now. She most likely needs some help and nurture herself , in order to provide it to her kids. YOu can`t pour form an ampty dish.
Lets help her, for the sake of the kids.
And do you really think the breaking the family for ever or for whatever period of time, separating the kids out and putting around institutions is a good solution here? -TALK TO SOMEONE WHO`S BEEN THROUGHT IT.
It is so difficult sometimes to get out of out bubble and imagine other people`s circimstances.

I am a single mother of one. I love my child more than life, but have had screamed, almost shook my child, shut the door and left, too . (Are you going to come and take mu child away?..)
She(Rebecca) has four.

Anna, a sometimes (my ex- is great and very involved) single parent.
St. Leonards on Sea

Re: DO YOU REALLY THINK A SINGLE (ANY) MOTHER (Parent
 

Plenty thanks.

And the first step in getting help for her is ensuring she does not get unsupervised access to her children.

Re: DO YOU REALLY THINK A SINGLE (ANY) MOTHER (Parent
 

Don't be ridiculous.

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

Well I would have thought there was an element of choice on her side to have 4 kids under five. Unless of course she had 4 drug & drink filled binges...

Well she did a damn good impression of having fun for 24 hours if you ask me.


Whilst IMHO the McCanns were culpable - I would suggest that there is a slight differance between being a few hundred yards away and checking on your kids every 15-20 mins - than leaving them for 24 hours !!

Re: DO YOU REALLY THINK A SINGLE (ANY) MOTHER (Parent
 

And so speaks the voice of experience.

She's proven she has a major problem and until she proves she's making progress I don't see her as being fit enough to be in charge of children.

Re: DO YOU REALLY THINK A SINGLE (ANY) MOTHER (Parent
 

I'm sorry Anna, but your post is a disgrace.

My parents worked all hours God sent to raise 3 boys and give us the best possible start in life. They did it all without having to rely on the state to bring up their children and without going on 24 hour drink and cocaine binges.

For long periods of time my dad even raised us single-handedly as my mum had severe PND for 2 of the births. There have been so horrificly hard times but a decent and responsible ethic has got us through.

So, irresponsible scrotes like Stephenson who have 4 children (probably by 3/4 dads) by the age of 22 that she can't look after - nor even seems to care about looking after - and the apologists like you cut no ice with me.

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

As the very actively involved full time father of 2 children, I don't doubt the stresses involved with trying to bring up 4 alone but at what point do the interests of the children have to supercede any pity or sympathy we may have for the mother in this case? Nobody really forces anyone to become pregnant once, let alone 4 times, and surely, as adults having presumably made that choice, we must take responsibility for our actions or accept that the state has to intervene when we can't fulfil our obligations to our children. I don't doubt that there are a great many people, who through no fault of their own, find themselves unable to cope and consequently fail their children in some form or other but I also feel there are rather too many parents out there who didn't much consider coping and the realities of parenthood before they chose to have their children. Given all the information readily available to people these days I'm not sure much more can be done about this latter group and sadly therefore, cases such as this will always happen.

Re: DO YOU REALLY THINK A SINGLE (ANY) MOTHER (Parent
 

Being in charge of them and having supervised access are 2 different things.

Re: DO YOU REALLY THINK A SINGLE (ANY) MOTHER (Parent
 

Make that man PM.

Re: DO YOU REALLY THINK A SINGLE (ANY) MOTHER (Parent
 

(sigh)

Read my post again. I said she should not have unsupervised access. As the adult that would make her in charge of them.

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

As someone who had 4 kids by the age of 24, I never felt the urge to leave my children on their own so that I could go out drinking, and certainly not a chance that I'd consider it with a 3 month old.

Selfish and irresponsible barely covers her actions.

Re: DO YOU REALLY THINK A SINGLE (ANY) MOTHER (Parent
 

She didn't beat the kids or sexually abuse them. unsupervised access won't necessarily mean they won't get fed for the few hours she has them for.

Re: DO YOU REALLY THINK A SINGLE (ANY) MOTHER (Parent
 

Seriously, some of the time I think you're just trying to wind me up.

As parents we demonstrate we have the responsibility to be able to look after our children. During school holidays and weekends I get totally unsupervised access to my daughter because I've demonstrated I'm responsible enough to look after her and see to her needs.

This woman has shown she's not capable of seeing to her children's needs. When the pressure got too much, she went out on a 25 hour bender.

What's to say she wouldn't do the same during further unsupervised access?

Disagreeing with me for the sake of disagreeing with me won't work in this case. She's proven she's untrustworthy with her children on her own.

Re: DO YOU REALLY THINK A SINGLE (ANY) MOTHER (Parent
 

:rolleyes: :dunce:

Did the McCann's get unsupervised access to their other children? should they have had supervised access even?

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

Just to correct you on the maths here and in the interests of accuracy.

They were left alone from approximately 22:30 (assuming she stayed in drinking and taking drugs for about an hour) until 10:00 the next day, when the the children's step-grandfather found them. So, they were alone for eleven and a half hours. There was no mention of any of the children's fathers being involved. ;)

Although, that does not pardon the fact that she left her children for the whole day and night, not caring if they were safe, fed, or watered during that time.

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

24 hour clock. :)
if you can manage to do the math wrong on something this simple, then I can say there's a very good chance that you are wrong on the other math fact you made. and who's to say I didn't mean one of her fathers?

Re: DO YOU REALLY THINK A SINGLE (ANY) MOTHER (Parent
 

As far as I'm aware they cannot be held accountable in a UK court for what happens in Portugal.

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

Actually I think you'll find
Day 1 22:30 approx she leaves the house
Day 2 10:00 they are found by her step-father
Day 2 22:30 she returns to her house

Kids were alone 11.5 hours, she left them 24 hours

Why the obsession with equating this to the McCann's - is their a point being made on class here?

Surely a whole heap of differance between the two cases - except this girl got lucky and nothing untoward happenned to her kids.

..and for the record - yes I have kids and would not have left them a) to go on a 24 bender or b) to eat tapas with my friends on holiday.

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

I stand corrected.

There's no obsession. and no point on class.

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

I think you need to review your understanding of the twenty-four hour clock. :rolleyes:

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

The thing that really gets me about this is that I am being hounded by my health visitor as my nearly 16 month old isn't 'complying' to commands like putting stuff in the bin and doesn't have very many words yet and being made to feel like I am failing as a parent?!?

As to the post about leaving your kids... all kids wind you up from time to time, it is very simple to put them somewhere safe, in their cot for instance, and go outside for 5 minutes to calm down, totally leaving is a different story altogether!

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

Your health visitor would probably have our kids off us then because our teenagers wont comply with commands to put stuff in the bin either and getting two words out of them is like getting blood out a stone at times.;)
In all seriousness though i think your health visitor possibly needs some retraining.Either that or wait until they`ve had a few kids of their own and they finally realize theres no set time for a child to begin walking & talking.......or indeed "complying" if thats your thing.

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

I told you that Calpol and Buckfast chaser idea would never work!

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

For Fingy's peace of mind (hopefully)

Stacey (18) learned to tie her shoelaces at 4, could tell the time at 5, but couldn't ride a 2 wheeler bike until she was almost 7.
Stephanie (16) didn't learn to tie her shoelaces until she was almost 8, learned to tell the time about 6, but was doing stunts on her 2 wheeler at the age of 4.
After this I stopped comparing, figuring they'd learn it when they wanted/needed to.

Stephanie was referred to a speech therapist as she only grunted, wouldn't talk at all, the referral didn't happen as we realised Stacey was speaking for her, Stephanie would point at something and Stacey would tell us what she wanted so she didn't have to bother learning how to talk properly. Once we stopped Stacey from doing this Stephanie learned very quickly to ask for what she wanted.

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

If you feel as though you are being "hounded," you can ask to change your health visitor. But, that doesn't mean that another one won't have similar concerns. It might mean, however, that they be more tactful and more constructive about how they can help you.

From personal experience, it is far better to identify developmental issues early on, rather than much later. If you are in the system early on, it is much less difficult to get the help you may need.

I know this is off topic, but how many words does he/she have? The average at his/her age should be about fifteen to twenty.

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

Thanks everyone, I'm not really too worried about him.

Lets see, mummy, daddy, nana, granda, tickle, up, again, meow, makes an attempt at woof, quack, uh oh!... think that is most of them, but she didn't hear him say any.

I know I can get her changed, but hopefully the next visit will be the last. If this was the only thing she had done I would possibly be more understanding in her being concerned about him but I have an ever growing list.

Mr A... thought you said that worked for all yours? Should I stop his daily pint of guinness?

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

Only a pint?

Or is that one before nap time, and two before bedtime?

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

I thought he was meant to get whiskey before bed? ;)

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

As a chaser, obviously

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

Malt gives health benefits.

My Mum swore by it and she was so proud that I had the biggest liver in the class in P1. ;)

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

At sixteen months, if one is to go by the "average," it would appear to be a little on the short side, but, if his words are continuing to grow, there shouldn't be too much to worry about. However, if they haven't progressed much more (i.e. at least trebled) by the time he is two years old. It may be wise to have him assessed. It doesn't do him any harm, but may help you to understand any questions you might have.

Your current HV maybe tactless and lacking in experience, but don't put her thoughts completely to one side. I would say that it is wise to continue monitoring his speech development and not worry until he is twenty to twenty-four months old. If he is not balancing enough to stand still for a short time, or cannot formulate a sentence (it doesn't have to make too much sense :)) of up to four words, you might want to consider your GP referring him to the relevant specialists.

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

Thanks, I do understand that his development needs to be monitored and where he 'should' be. He certainly understands a lot more words than he can say and will look for a certain toy or his juice etc if I ask him to. He also started today going aww at the cat, so mark the list up one.

It just winds me up, she has been trying to force me to anti-depressants from my son was about 10 days old when there is totally no need for them. I'm as balanced as I have always been. (shurrit Mr A!)

My mum did not speak a word until she was 2 and then spoke in sentances, a few kids I know didn't speak at all until quite late and are now fine and none of them have been referred etc.

Most people I have told about this have been baffled, but there again, most of their health visisors have not been in touch since their kids were about 6 weeks old. One doesn't even know who her health visitor is. There is an estate very close to where I live and there are toddlers out playing in the street on their own, some kids running about the street with hardly if any clothes on etc, yet they do not seem to be getting any attention. Though I have a feeling they may have told their Health Visitor to leave them alone as I am led to believe you are allowed to do.

Anyhoo, totally brought off topic (ish) sorry Moddy People.

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

Do the digits thing sometime after 8pm.

Mine were all reared on Calpol & whiskey - that's why you're confused!!

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

Calpol for the kids, and whisky for you - win/win.



(there appears to be a superfluous 'e' in your whisky - one way of getting loved up ;))

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

Done, ta! (the digits not the calpol) ;)

Re: Drink binge mother left children
 

I'm surprised Fingy's Health visitor has the time...I barely saw mine especially once both mine turned 2.;)