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A simple question about love, poetry and leaving home
attention, girl i fancy is leaving permanantly ( not not because of me) this will proberbly be the last time i see her, all being well might go on a night out, so do i hand over all that i have written about her in poetry at the end of the night tell her to read it when shes left or leave it as dead as a duck thats shot up the arse ?
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Enjoy your night out and treasure the memories that you have of the good times you've spent together. Keep your writings to yourself, but make sure she understands (in other words just tell her) that she is very special to you and that you would like to stay in touch. |
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i'll go with raist
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she knows how i feel, ive been there on a couple of occasions, i just wanted her to remember me by something, its diffarent when its someone your emotionally attached to, even if they are not.
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I can't help but think that you've already made your own mind up mate - sorry if that's not the case.
I really think that it's best to leave this one as it is, for yourself as well as for her. If she knows how you feel already then there's no harm in repeating it when you say goodbye to her - I wouldn't give over the poetry though. I would just let it be as it is, cherish what you have and what you've had - and let her remember the caring, thoughtful, you that feels deeply for her. Don't burden the situation with anything more than she might feel comfortable with. |
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ok so a leaving present then ?
apologies for the spelling, can a mod correct it in the poll ? |
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Something simple, but that she can keep. Not too extravagant, but something that will always be a reminder of the depth of feeling that you have for her. Something not too personal (so no knickers :D ), yet just personal enough so that it shows you've thought about it. |
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I'm in the 'wtf?' camp here m8........poetry?--too needy and wierd! Don't do it! :erm:
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maybe a necklace with her name on it ????
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Engraved ipods are off limits btw...
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i will NOT be doing poetry guys i think ill let that rest. |
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By the way, in case anybody thinks otherwise, I'm not totally insensitive to how you're feeling kronas.
When I was about 15/16 my first love moved away and I never got to tell her how I really felt about her. I still miss her, and regret not having the courage to tell her how I felt. |
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I have voted.
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Do not give out the poetry. it is very sad & desperate. Sorry Mate.
just give her a small present that will remind her of you, not jewlery. Sorry I would not. I do feel for you, as I am very bad at getting the girls, probably cause I have no self confidence in that area. good luck, ik |
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You could get that picture of her and the lolly framed for her?
Inexpensive, has meaning and she will always remember who took it... |
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That's actually a nice idea :) If you've got a picture of the two of you together perhaps you could buy one of those double frames, put the one of her on her own in one side and the picture of both of you in the other. |
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I wouldn't do it if I was you mate. She is leaving so no good can come out of this (she already knows you like her), but this could really backfire spectactularly ensuring that not only do you not see her again, you won't speak, e-mail or write to her either. It could really batter her emotionally, as I know some of your poems, and at best give her heartache, at worse, completely freak her out.
You mentioned you are learning from past mistakes, like with the Ipod, please listen to us this time, we only want what's best for you, and many of us have learned the hard way too. Please don't do it. A small, inexpensive but personal gift like Tuftus' picture idea is a pretty good one. It isn't out of character, so it shouldn't really change the way she feels about you. As I have said no good can come out of this, only trouble, I can't advise you more strongly not to do it mate. |
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ik |
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If not I am sure Kronas could apply the idea with another more suitable pic :) |
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kronas keep the poetry for yourself as memories to cherish.
Don't give up..keep looking...the next girl may be the one or she may not but you should enjoy the time that it takes to find the right girl..you are only 19 once...enjoy it while you are as young as you are. :hugs: |
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Sorry, but I've gone for option 3.
Really not a good idea.... |
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ive said it before poetry thing is out of the window, however im still looking for something suitable, i have a few weeks yet, i tend to go for the spectacular mind :D |
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You are not listening! Keep it simple and don't go over the top...PLEASE. |
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I think the photo idea is lovely - she will always have that to remind her of you. As Coggy said, keep the poetry for yourself, it will be a lovely reminder in years to come. |
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I would select one of your best poems - one that conveys how you feel, but which doesn't go over the top - and present it to her.
I'd tell her I would really miss her, but wish her all the best, and then leave it at that. If she knows how you feel, but hasn't taken things further herself, it would unwise to press matters further. |
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the innuendo i could post here....must resist, and guard agaisnt the nugmeister.....must....resist...
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STIG???????? |
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stig?? I am bored although dont ask my instructor about our latest lesson. :rofl: |
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I dunno. The important thing here is that she already knows how you feel so there is little point in that poetry idea.
If you just want something for her to remember you then I suggest a present. You want something for her to remember you in a positive way, the poetry MAY freak her out. I dunno though, I am not good at that stuff either |
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if its chav stuff she likes, then poetry is not the way to go as someone suggested you do, but everyone else says no to. then she would probably like her name on a necklace from Elizabeth Duke, that very expensive ARGOS brand............... seriously, something that she can see nearly daily, is not too personal, and it should suit your personality, as a present you would want to give, and a present she would want to buy for herself. this makes it a better more personal momento. I think she would like something like this. but what is this, well that is where you have to do a lot of work and thinking, only you know her, and only you really know you truley. there you go,,,, clear as mud. ik |
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I dont know the whole story but I wouldnt give her the poetry, Keep it for yourself and lock it away.
Also I dont think the photo of both of you is a good idea either, If a male friend of mine gave me a frame with our photo's in I would think that real weird https://www.cableforum.co.uk/images/local/2005/10/8.gif I think a cute card, blank inside so that you can just write a few words on the lines of good luck etc would be ok and she can keep that without it being too much https://www.cableforum.co.uk/images/local/2005/10/9.gif I dont know the situation but if she likes you she will have you in her head already, material stuff isnt needed https://www.cableforum.co.uk/images/local/2005/10/9.gif |
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get her drunk while you stay cunningly sober ;) then poor your soul out ,if she likes it then wayhey if not you can say you were both drunk and just rambling ;) :LOL:
Cant vote for some reason my choice isnt up there :D |
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oi :knock: Kronas, I'm with Ellie on this one, if she wanted any kind of relationship with you then it would have happened by now. She has memories of you and that can be better than any present which could be convienently shoved in a drawer or put on a car boot sale. Cherish the time you've had with her, wish her all the best and put this all behind you, chin up and Miss Right will be along sometime soon for you. |
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In all seriousness Kronas, isn't it just time to move on? As you've said, she knows how you feel about her, so might it not boff up the memories that you both have if you give her a gift of any sort? What if you hand over whatever it is you get, and it's firmly rebuffed. IMO, it's time for you to move on and see what happens in the future - as Coggy said, you're only 19 once so just try to enjoy the present, instead of mulling over the past. |
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On a serious note though, Maybe the subject could be bought up in a subtle way,or maybe he should just come out with it and say " have you ever thought about a possible future for us" .Im not say kronos says " oh before you leave im in love with you" cuz thats to heavy,but she is going anyway it may be worth a shot... BTW im useless in matters of the heart so im best ignored ;) |
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I'm with the majority here,
She has already stated she sees you as a friend, but has no romantic intentions, so buy her a nice little something (note LITTLE - don't go overboard, or she'll just stick it in a drawer and think she's well shot of that "stalker" she thought was a friend) and allow you both to move on with the least amount of awkwardness and embarrasment. The last thing you want is her last memory of you being one of a bloke who just wouldn't take no for an answer. |
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And for the record - let it go! You will make her feel awkward and risk pouring the memory of your last night out together. Sadly life is not like a Hollywood rom com. Your poetry will not make her suddenly change her feelings for you. |
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Leave it Kronie,
Seriously. Although you may feel as if your heart is being torn out she does not feel the same and she will have memories of you to live on with. Just as you do. Sian |
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im thinking rollocks to that, ill proberbly never meet anyone, i just dont seem to attract women, i dont try most of the time, i just let things happen, but i tried this time and over did it at many times i think, not out of desperation, but i have been thinking constantly about what its like to love and be loved and i seem to be at my happiest when i can truely love someone for being them, not just on a physical scale but emotionally too. im missing out on a lot of things in life and i feel empty. Quote:
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You need to stop trying to force the issue. As you have already realised, over-doing it does more harm than good. Just try to enjoy life. Concentrate on being the best person you can possibly be, be a good and loyal friend to all your acquaintances. One day, you will find a partner who will truly, equally, and without any forcing on your part, do for you what you would do for her. Believe me, that is the only kind of relationship you want to be in, and you can't force it to happen. |
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well i have deicded not to do anything, this person has become to distant for me (i can see why) so if that person doesent care why should you ?
problem is today its her birthday and im trying to block my emotions out, but i guess im human after all, i care too much :( |
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FWIW, my thoughts are that you're trying too hard. It's said that a watched kettle never boils, you can never find the thing you seek hardest, and you never know what you're looking for till you find it. This girl may seem wonderful to you now, but that is because you so desperately want to be in love. But going out and looking for it is the worst thing you can do. Love is out there... if you just go about your life, it will come and find you. Stick with it, don't think about the girl, and concentrate on making sure that every day you do something to feel good about. And KEEP SMILING!! You may not always feel happy, but you will keep everyone guessing! |
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And as for people who are comfortable with life, let them get on with it. Just remember, when you do fall in love, it will hit you like a comet; then you will know what real happiness is. And you will look at those people, and want to shout out loud just how happy you are, because you alone will know that you are happier than they could ever be. As Diana Ross sang, "You can't hurry love". Just be patient, it's well worth the wait. |
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And you are only 19.Lots and lots of time to fall in love and form a relationship.Just get on with your life and meeting friends and going places.'Things' will fall into place eventually and you'll look back at your 18/19 year old self and wonder at the person you were. ;)
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Kronie matey, its only human to care. I went the other way, I didnt give a toss, got me into sooooo much trouble I would never go there again. What you need to do is learn to deal with things, dont analyse stuff too much, dont crowd people and dont write them poems. Peotry is a good thing, but telling someone you have written a peom about them is NOT good. Writing a peom based on feelings you have when with them is fine, as long as they cant be 100% certain it is about them. Dont go looking for love, you will never find it that way. Love will come to you when the time is right. The time may never be right, its true you may be destined to be a batchelor, if thats the case then the best thing is to be loved by your friends and family. Be someone thye can talk to, be someone they find fun in being around, do not suddenly say "I love you" its only going to scare them away. Be there for people then and only then can they truelly find the real you. |
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