how can someone do this ?
 

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/l...re/4625469.stm

:(

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

It is sad, but at least the child is a safe and well, lets hope they find the mother were ever she may be

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There was one found near us a few years ago just off the A614 in a laybye, the police have still not traced the mother. It's not a time to birate the mother you don't know what's going through their minds, they need help as well as the new born baby.

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For gods sake--at least take the baby to a hospital before abandoning it :mad:

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What the man says!:tu: Please don`t just dump them! At least give the poor littles mites some kind of chance for ****s sake!:mad: :mad: :mad: :(

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thats what i was thinking why leave it just anywhere :erm:

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Makes me sick! Just well and truly does. I agree with budwieser on this one!

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The mother may be little more than a child her self, having said that she could have left her on a door step or some thing were it was guaranteed she would be found

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you're right, Jules, we don't know the circumstances enough to judge the mother, the baby is ok, though, thank goodness.:tu:

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

I agree with you there but that is how a normal thinking person would think perhaps.

The childs mother could be a druggy, perhaps a young teenager or less who is too scared, or perhaps the mother is ill or ashamed of something.

There is too many variables to consider before slating the mother here.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

Good point. We don't know anything about the mother, or her state of mind. It's also entirely possible she was suffering some form of depression, and may not have been entirely aware of what she was doing.

Not defending her, just pointing out we don't know enough..

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

That is just callous and I am afraid just shows up the degradation of society these days, ala throw away society.

It is sick. It makes me sick. Angry.

:mad:

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Again the mother could be ill,not mentally there,scared,ashamed,underage,under pressure.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

did you mean that? :monkey:

Either way, for someone to do that there must be something very wrong with them.

why knows WHY she decided on a bush? Depending on the mental state of the mother, it could've seemed a great idea. daft as it might sound, she might be under the deluded impression that the fairies who live in the bushes will look after the baby. Laugh if you like, but mental illness comes in all shapes and sizes, and it really wouldn't surprise me if it turned out she expects the smurfs to look after her baby.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

absolutely, the baby is ok, is the main thing, right now. Let's hope the mother reports in soon ......

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

I agree, also DNA may say something, with the baby being so young there is a chance either the mother gave birth at home ( could mean young girl ) and then dumped. Chances are she will need attention emotionally and physically.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

Yes I did.

Society these days has a throw away mentality, and I am not a monkey, that would be my mrs... :angel:

What did you do with your consumer durable that you recently bought to replace the old one? Sell it on? or chuck it in the skip? ;)

Yes, who knows why? but for the love of god, WHY? Every one has bad days, me included, maybe that is why i am on anti depressants (another story for another thread) but leav e your babay in a bush? No man! That is just not right! No matter how dimly common sense in viewed IMO.

So I am not laughing at mental illness as I am unfortunate to have one, but I at least know right from wrong, and that is most definately wrong my friend.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

And yet nobody gets in a righteous froth about all the unwanted babies who get thrown away every year, legally, thanks to a legal loophole called abortion.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

Lets keep this held on topic of a mother perhaps more mentally ill then we are, also perhaps a scared teenager in a family who she fears will outcast her if she tells them gives birth in a alley way and has to leave her baby there and act like nothing happened.

The above is not a fairy tale it is a true story I heard.

We need to remember that this person could have had little or no choice, and when scared frightned young and being oppressed mistakes happen.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

well, first off i'm a bad example. I'm a hoarder. :)

WHY? If i knew that, i'd be a psychiatrist and not a CSA. :) When your judgement is impaired through drink, drugs, mental illness or emotional troubles, there's no point asking why.

it's absolutely wrong. I'm not defending the action, just saying that the person might not be 100% aware of their actions and consequences thereof.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

One possibility is that the baby may have been dumped there by someone other than the mother. Some cultures regard the shame of a baby outside marriage as totally beyond words and it's possible this could be the action of an outraged and demented father. At this stage, with no further details, I think you should all be ashamed of juding the mother. Be righteous and indigant when the truth is known.

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I think not :dozey:..........however as Marge said, there may be others involved who need 'slating'............
__________________

Well put but the mother is the one who opened her legs..............

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

Ramrod, aren't you being a bit quick to judge?

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Is there any indication this happens more often these days, than 20 or 30 years ago?

It has happened in the pasy, and sadly, it will happen in the future. It's a little premature to blame the 'throw away society' imo...

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

I'm not trying to go OT, I'm trying to contrast the indignation some have expressed over this child being dumped, when society, by and large, approves of other mothers doing just that with their babies by disposing of them before they are born.

FWIW it breaks my heart to think of that poor little girl dumped under a bush. When I have a newborn here in my own house I can pick up and cuddle, I cannot imagine how someone could do such a thing to someone like her. But I have to believe that there is a very good reason indeed, and I hope they find the mother because she needs help.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

I remember from my old surgery days a young girl who had sex one time only. Of course, sods law, she got pregnant. She was so ashamed of what had happened that she didn't tell anyone and had no antenatal care, nothing. When the time came and she went into labour at home her mum rang the emergency doctor saying her daughter had tummy pains. Off to hospital where they discover she's about to give birth :erm:

All hell then breaks loose when baby makes it's appearance. The midwives are told in no uncertain terms that if they come to the house they come in normal clothes. The end result of all this is baby is put up for adoption and mum is told she's off to America to live so the family don't have to endure her shame.

To be honest I think the family may have done something similar or worse to the baby if they thought they could have got away with it, things were that bad. They were of a culture where single mums with babies are just not the done thing.

This is why I can imagine the family doing something like this just as easily as a desperate mother who has been abandoned.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

:tu:

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

I am aware of the possibilities of what is probably happening in the background but in the final analysis the mother has abandoned a newborn baby, her baby, under a bush rather than taking it to somewhere it's survival could be guaranteed.
I don't care how confused, distraught or stupid the mother is......it's just unforgivable...........

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

Ramrod consider this scenario.

A young teenage female gets pregnant by a peer presureing group who make her sleep with someone as is sadly common within our schools these days, her parents have drilled into her not to get pregnant and she is scared they will outcast her, or she will get into alot of trouble.

Scared and likely feeling very very alone from the world she goes out when the conractions starts in agony and gives birth likely in some alley somewhere, from there she has to leave her baby and go home.

With all the fear and pain it does not hit her to go with the baby to hospital, and she is scared that if she did goto hospital that they will involve her parents. ( she likely would not know better)

Now this girl could be at home in her bedroom crying her heart out, and cannot tell a soul.

How can we hate someone in such distress?

I know I sure as hell can't :(

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I know that in years to come she will feel the same way............ :(

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

Lets hope she is found and her and her parents ( if that be the case ) get help.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

She could have left the baby in the hospital car park/next to A&E...........
Oh I don't hate her.......far from it. I feel pity for the silly/confused/thoughtless/drugged up/whatever girl.............. and I am even more sad for the poor child who has such a mother :(

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

Depends on how far the hospital is from her house?

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

You are looking at it as a black and white situation. There could be any one of a number of things that caused the woman to abandon her baby. I am not defending her actions at all, but I do not believe any of us has enough information to judge.

For instance, I believe that in extreme cases of Post Natal Depression, it's entirely possible for women to have babies and be totally unable to accept they have babies. Maybe this woman is suffering from this?

As I said, you appear to see it as a black and white situation. Unfortunately, it is not. It has many shades of grey..

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

Do me a favour.........
__________________

I know it has many shades of grey. I know she is confused. I know she is probably stressed. I know that she needs help. I know that she may be being pressured. All that may or may not be happening behind the scenes in her life does not excuse the way she did what she did.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

Thats awful. Im glad the baby is OK.
I dont know how people can leave a new born like that....anything could have happened.

That part of the city is well known for being "dodgy" so it doesnt suprise me that this kind of thing is going on there.

A life is precious and leaving a baby like that is just evil.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

Ramrod consider the possiblity she gave birth alone in a alley way scared out of her mind, and not thinking straight.


Nothing excuses her from what she did, I bet if she did dump it at A/E people would complain about her getting pregnant.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

i feel badly for the mother of child too but i cant seem to feel any sympathy at all, yes we dont know the full facnts but under a bush! thats what gets to me the most, in society we should treat humans respectfully and to just dump a newborn ina bush id down right distastful and practically as you said unforgiveable.

i wonder if the father would like to know about the baby or does....

although i have seen what cases of post-natal depression can do, however i dont believe in this case it was related, the cases i have seen were related to women who had their children and didnt dump them but felt numb and unhappy, threatening to hard their babies or have negligent thoughts.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

Although everyone is saying we should find the mother...... ok lets make sure she is OK, but surely you would not want to give her the baby back would you ?
Unless she was forced to put the baby there she is in no fit state to care for a baby.
May be after counseling and treatment but not now.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

no i would not if i was social services.

we dont know the ins and outs.


ima ll too wary but unless there were mitigating circumstances i cant see why she should have the baby back.

i cant see forgivness in dumping a baby there just like that.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

Perhaps they will call it Moses.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

I know it is important to try to help the mother to learn to accept her child and care for it, but it depends on the care the child will get and the life it will grow up to have.

As Kronas says, we dont know the full story as to why she left the baby there. If the mother was young or the dad had left her on her own, she may not be aware that help is available.

Still, it is chance that the baby was found and the outcome could have been a lot worse. Lets hope the baby has a better life ahead.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

how is it ? if the women who gave birth or father cannot be found that child is going to grow up with non-biological parents, i think psycologically for the child it will be bad when that child grows up and finds out (maybe does) that the parents are not his/hers real parents i would like to know if i was in that position, you need your own biological mother in your life.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

I think the baby will get all the love in the world with or without it's biological mother, you have to look out there or have people in your family who can't have children, this child will be placed in a loving home by Social Services, in a home where the child will be bought up with stability by loving parents.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

I have considered it.


Well said! :tu: :)

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

Could have been worse, could have found a newborn baby dead in a bin

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

Full Story here


We cannot Judge anyone who abandons a baby. Sad as it may be, and alien to most of us, we are not there, we do not understand, we do not feel what they feel.


Abandoning is usually the LAST resort in a terrible situation. The idea of amnesty (as in China) is a good idea, but there is also the fear of being judged.


We should not criticise what we cannot understand, the mother must have been going through her own personal hell.

Re: how can someone do this ?
 

I agree with you Simon that we would need to know all the facts before judging thi situation.

As for the child growing up without its parents kronas, A lot of children who adopt children have given them a great start in life, offering them a loving family to come into.