Women
 

I had a bit of a ding dong with the missus last weekend, so Monday night she texts me saying I will see you Thursday. "Ok" I think to myself that's when I'll see her next. Today I was dumfounded to be texted several times getting onto me about why I had not contacted her :shrug:

Re: Women
 

Ah - you didn't have your telepathic head on then? ;)

Re: Women
 

Trying to work them out.
this way lies madness

Re: Women
 

Well said :) . I'm off to the pub to reflect on things

Re: Women
 

I agree women can be bizarre and even absurd sometimes, but I think she has a point. If it was me i'd at least message her something back in acknowledgement. Especially given that SMS is really haphazard. I have had texts disappear into the ether, arrive 3 weeks later, and become corrupted/truncated.

Re: Women
 

no, thats exactly how women intend them to be :D

Re: Women
 

Well to make up for things, you could always send her a nice peach.

:D

Re: Women
 

I'm sure it'll be peachy in the end! :erm:

Re: Women
 

SMS is not a reliable antidote to PMS

Re: Women
 

Gives everyone THE LOOK particularily Nikko. :fit:

Re: Women
 

Nothing personal, Coggy - my ex used to be a a nightmare 4 days a month.

The rest of the time she was insufferable.

Re: Women
 

Calm down dear, it's just a troll thread! ;)

Re: Women
 

Here's me thinking that it was an advert for Esure and you were Michael Winner! ;)

Re: Women
 

But I am the only one sticking up for the woman! To the ridicule of other blokes I might add.

Flaming women. Never satistified :)








(Kidding :))

Re: Women
 

Give them an inch, they want the other one.

Re: Women
 

Well if men didn't keep lying about how many inches there were in the first place......... there are men who claim there's an extra inch when there obviously isn't :eek: ;)

Why the hell shouldn't we make claim to that extra inch!!! :p:



Actually........ this argument reminds me of the London meet :erm: MEN!!! :D

Re: Women
 

The Navigation House in Abercynon by any chance? :rolleyes: :dozey:

Re: Women
 

having seen various people over the years fall into the trap - what u want to do is just be mean from the start not too cruel just saying no and putting your foot down they will sulk they will moan just ignore em if they like you within an hour they will forget about it as location location location or sex in the city comes on tv ..

oh and lie a lot

Re: Women
 

What happened?

(And incidently men would love to live in a society where the size of your manhood isn;t the be all and end all, but unfortunately size matters, and women let us know it.)

Re: Women
 

Why does it take three women with PMT to change a light bulb?
















:mad: BECAUSE IT DOES!!!!! :mad: ;) :Sprint:

Re: Women
 

You mean that the gap between the two brackets following this question isn't 8 inches? ( )

Re: Women
 

How many women does it take to change a light bulb?












One. ONE!! And do you know WHY it only takes ONE?
Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb. They don't even know the bulb is BURNED OUT.
They would sit in this house in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it OUT. And once they figured it out they wouldn't be able to find the light bulbs despite the fact that they've been in the SAME CUPBOARD for the past SEVENTEEN YEARS.
But if they did, by some miracle, actually find the light bulbs, TWO DAYS LATER the chair that they dragged from two rooms over to stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!!
AND UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE CRUMPLED WRAPPER THE STUPID @*!#$% LIGHT BULBS CAME IN! WHY?! BECAUSE NO ONE IN THIS HOUSE EVER CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!!
IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE 12 FEET DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE. THE HOUSE!! IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS...I'm sorry...what did you ask me?

:D

Re: Women
 

I think you might need a vallium or two ;)

Re: Women
 

It was a joke...

Re: Women
 

My biggest gripe about women is how they can't stick to the point/problem being argued over. They just can't help dredging up sh*t that happened years ago every bl**dy time. On the rare occasions that we have an argument I have to keep dragging the 'discussion' back to the topic in hand. :mad:
On the other hand, I think their good points outweigh their faults.......beautiful, bewitching, sexy........ :D

Re: Women
 

8 inches? Of course it is....... and it's a beautiful 8 inches..... and i don't know why you're so anxious about it, darling....... you know size doesn't matter to me :)

Or the 10 cm in diameter would be an issue........ ;) :p:




I thought that was very funny :D
But if you don't need that valium....... there are some of us that do :D


........ and i agree with Punky...... even with the bizarre and absurd bit but i've found that works both ways...... we just see and interpret things differently i suppose, but that doesn't meant that i find us women any easier to understand at times :shrug:
However.... i have been on the other end of a similar situation as the one described by Huggy Bear. I've been told that a meeting would take place about a week or more in advance and then not received any other communication before the set time :erm:
I suppose i just need more reassurance..... this particular man had cancelled at the last minute (and i mean minute) before. Things happen..... meetings get cancelled...... some people are more casual about them and don't think that the other person will mind or be put out :shrug:
I like to be a little more considerate :)
Perhaps this 'missus' feels neglected generally..... doesn't trust Huggy Bear........ has reason to believe that Huggy Bear is unreliable.....
Bit hard generalising about all women if we know nothing about Huggy's behaviour and how he's treated his 'missus' in the past.

Either way....... a little consideration for the other person doesn't kill you..... and if you love them, would it hurt to make them happy? :)


and yes......... i ignored you ramrod.......... another thing us women do well ;) But am sure that i'll bring up your last post in the future and make your life hell for it :p: ;)

Re: Women
 

Someone tried to do the "How many women with PMT does it take to change a light bulb?" joke in front of my ex-girlfriend once and was *very* surprised when he got the reply:















ONE! AND IT ISN'T FUNNY!!!

:D

Re: Women
 

*sigh* Women, can't live with 'em, can't kill 'em!

Re: Women
 

"That's strange love. I texted you back saying <insert something soppy here>. I thought it was strange that you didn't text me back, but I thought you were still upset with me. It'll be network congestion - they drop texts"

Re: Women
 

Why don't we just insert the word people where ever it says men or women and see if it's just as funny? :rolleyes:

Re: Women
 

Perhaps for the same reason the way 'ladettes' don't replace the word 'men' with 'people' when they say "all men are b*****ds" ;)

Re: Women
 

I like your thinking :D

Re: Women
 

Well I thought that was what I suggested that WE all do whomever or whatever our sex,sexuality and other preferences. :erm:

Re: Women
 

russ, have you been eavesdropping on me and bb31 :erm:

Re: Women
 

no need too, women dont talk that quietly :D

Re: Women
 

oi :knock: :knock:

Re: Women
 

yes? :angel:

Re: Women
 

Why can't women cut unsliced bread properly,, just got the loaf out of the bread bin and it looks like a ski slope on the cut end.:mad:

Re: Women
 

Or throw properly?

Re: Women
 

mmmmm actually true of sorts, can't play darts to save my life :erm:

Re: Women
 

Or fold up a newspaper neatly after reading it??

Re: Women
 

If your going to list everything youll end up with a thread longer than the Non Sequitur Thread

Time to :Sprint:

Re: Women
 

oops: :blush:

Re: Women
 

Awww leave them alone, they try their best, bless 'em.

*runs and hides* :Sprint: :angel:

Re: Women
 

Or get a true free speech site without people getting banned for saying what they think

Re: Women
 

Jeez, it was only a joke. I was jokingly joining in with the women bashing by faux-patronising them.

Re: Women
 

Freedom of speech comes with responsibilities though, and it's not what you say that gets you banned, it's how you say it :)

Re: Women
 

Aww, there's peachy :)

You are the weakest link, goodbye :p:

Re: Women
 

Was that Jerrek?

Re: Women
 

Read my comments again.......sssslllllooooowwwwwllllyyyyy... ;)

It's a kind of play-on-words :D

Re: Women
 

Sniff Sniff someone mention peaches.

Re: Women
 

Not anymore they don't ;)

On with the topic in hand now.....

Re: Women
 

Alright. Enough. Someone explain this peaches thing. At times it's like MI5 on this forum :D

Re: Women
 

Eh? Nevermind don't think it was him. Thought his surname began with C.

Re: Women
 

Just a banned member who keeps reregistering and gets caught every time.

Enough off-topic silliness now anyway.

Where were we? Ah yes, women. Rubbish at parking too :angel:

Re: Women
 

Well dont know whether we can as Peachey is male and this thread is about Women so it may be a little :notopic:

But Peachey was a member here and was banned some time ago and every day reappears is some new username until he is hunted out by the Mods/Admin and sussed by some of the ever alert members here.

Sorry to shatter your illusions but nothing MI5 about it.

:D

Re: Women
 

I thought peachey was [ [Mod Edit] (Chris T):Off topic speculation removed ]

Re: Women
 

Enough talk about banned members please :)

Re: Women
 

Enough, people! Peachey is gone again, and speculation as to his/her identity is not for this thread. Besides, it's unfair to those who may be wrongly tarred in the process.

A little post editing, methinks...

Re: Women
 

Of course, it could be argued that for several days each month, women have an excuse for being angry or moody.

And anyone who says that women's bodies don't synchronise their periods with their friends has never worked in an office with all women. I used to, and for about 3-4 days per month nothing I could do at work would be right. Luckily, although my line manager was a women, the owner of the company was a man and also experienced the same thing as me.

Anyway, I digress. Not all women suffer badly from PMT. Some do (as do their boyfriends, brothers, husbands, male friends etc), but a lot don't.

Anyway, I love women. I find it amazing how, according to women, a man can go from being the best person on earth to the spawn of the devil (and back again) in less than 3 minutes. I know. I have actually done this (and was called "the spawn of the devil" by the woman concerned - all I'd actually done was bought and watched Pulp Fiction).

Re: Women
 

Oh yeah, I love women too - it's the lesbians I don't get along with. They take up women and eliminate a bloke's options :D

It's for this reason I think gay men are cool - less blokes equals more women to go around :p:

*legs it :Sprint:

Re: Women
 

Whoa Whoa, I can park damm good...................

and drink as well :erm: had several galsses sorry :blush:

Re: Women
 

Whilst I fully agree with your sentiments, I do wonder how that statement goes down at your local church meeting ? :D

Re: Women
 

Is that glasses or gals? :)

Re: Women
 

Nothing wrong with it, and if you really want to know why, PM me and I'll tell you :D


Yeah......sure you do :p:

Re: Women
 

whoops, should be glasses however i am at bb31's house ;)

Re: Women
 

If you can say it at your church meeting, then surely you can say it here :D



Do tell :naughty:

Re: Women
 

God you are asking trouble saying that! :naughty:

Re: Women
 

Yes but that would be off-topic :D

Re: Women
 

you boys, *tut tut* thinking we're up to no good ;)

Re: Women
 

You could start a new thread entitled:

Hi, my name is Russ D, and as a pentecostal Christian, I think gay people are cool as more gays results in more women going around for us blokes (to marry obviously, as you're only supposed to have one woman, but I can choose a nicer one now, I mean it's not as if I would errm, would this be a good time to get my coat..?) :p: :angel:

Re: Women
 

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Sorry, but I just couldn't bear to edit one word of that :D

Re: Women
 

Well it looks like you've done it for me! Although I the stress the 'more women' bit is in order to give us more choice, and not 'more to play with' :)

And as for your last line, don't worry, we'll post it once your ban has been finalised :D

Re: Women
 

Am I in twuble now? :angel: :p:

Re: Women
 

Ah, but sometimes it's worth it! :D

Re: Women
 

Yes

Re: Women
 

Oh dear... :(

Re: Women
 

Don't worry, I am painting the: "Unban The CableForum One" signs now :)

Re: Women
 

We could easily make it two if you continue to poke your nose in :D :p:

Re: Women
 

One for all, and all for one :ninja: :ninja: :ninja:

Time for bed now (for me) gentlemen. It's been fun :)

Re: Women
 

I never question a woman's ability to drink. I have one Aunt that can drink more than anyone I know (me included), and I have a female friend who can down a pint of Guinness in one (which is an achievement in itself) faster than anyone I know, male or female.

Re: Women
 

See what I mean, she's done it again,

On the left is the first slice I had to take to level it up, and on the right is my second slice,
Why is this so difficult ladies,:confused: :)

And before you ask, the chocs are for any children who have made a decent effort tonight.:cool:

Re: Women
 

She's going to kill you - not for the bread but for revealing the dust on top of the Iced Diamond to all the world :p: :D

Re: Women
 

He might have got away with it, if you hadn't drawn attention to the schoolboy error :disturbd:

Re: Women
 

Good for her.I can't think of a better way of getting out of the chore of sandwich/toastmaking.It's what my husband does. ;) In fact I predict that most of the cr@ppy bread slicing is done by men. :p:

Re: Women
 

On the other hand the sensible approach is to get consistently sizes slices, done in the machine at the bakery.

Re: Women
 

You'll be surprised at the number of people on this forum that make their own bread.

Re: Women
 

Since my culinary skills extend to stabbing it twice and waiting for it to go PING!, the last thing I'd have paid attention to was that thread ;)

Re: Women
 

oops:

Re: Women
 

and I suppose there are no men that are rubbish :mad:

Re: Women
 

You are so good you can have the job Permenantly

Re: Women
 

Yeah, be careful Iadom, or you might find your sarnie supply drying up all of a sudden :)

About the parking thing. A little while ago, I was out with a female friend of mine. I went to parallel park, bosh bosh bosh, done. Car actually parallel to the curb, wheels a few inches away. Took me a couple of seconds and I guess I made it look easy (experience I guess), and she was gobsmacked. She has a Ka (who on earth can't park a Ka?), and said she wished she, and her mates found it that easy. I was chuffed to say the least. It wern't even my mum's old 5 series either.

Re: Women
 

just to let you all know,
greenkeeper
1. I dust on top of the freezer and fridge when I defrost them, it is not good practice to drag them out more often than that.
Incognitas
2. I was cutting the bread to make her toast ( I have oven bottom muffins) to go with the breakfast that I prepare every Sunday.

3. I also cook 80% of the meals and do 95% of the washing up, all the vacuuming, half the washing, ironing, dusting, cleaning the bathroom etc, etc. I also do some of the shopping as well so there.:p: :angel:

Re: Women
 

So guess who wears the trousers in your house :p:

Re: Women
 

so who wears the skirt ? :erm: :disturbd: :p: ;)

Re: Women
 

It's a known biological fact that men are better at spacial awareness tasks than women.
And before the women get up and throw things at me (as if they could hit me :disturbd: ) it's also a known biological fact that women are better at comunicating (except to a bloke when he's done something wrong), multitasking (remember women have a motorway between the two halfs of their brains, men have a dirt track), and gazing at men's bums without being caught (it's true, your periferal vision is better than us bloke's)

Re: Women
 

ah, good old science :)

Re: Women
 

I dare say by posting this, I'll get branded a mysoganist. I don't hate women, actually far from it. (if I did hate them, it would save me a lot of grief and heartache), but I do hate inequality, injustice and elitism.

I managed to catch the second half of "Britain's secret shame" today, where it exclusively talked about deaths of women prisoners. Now, trying to prevent the death of prisoners, is admirable. But that only women prisoners deserve that effort and the men can be thrown to the wolves? What kind of country are we leading to where we keep getting these programs that portray women are special, and elite, and therefore worthy of protection, that men aren't allowed? The stats are, that 85 men died in prison, while 9 women died. Admitted the percentage does work out that women are twice as likely to die, but isn't 85 deaths worse than 9? Couple that with the fact there are all these women-only outreach programs, and they get linient sentencing anyway.

I believe in the "one world, one people" principal, where gender and race are taken out of the equation. There shouldn't be any such thing as "male criminals" and "female criminals". You should only have criminals and non criminals, and I really despise the way people say "let's help these people over here, but not over there". By keep partitioning society into all these different groups will never give us equality. I am not saying we should stop helping women with this, or that, but everyone should be helped, as a whole.

Am I crazy, or being mysoganist or do I have a point? If you disagree, please don't red rep, please prove me wrong. I am not trying to preach hate against women, but the opposite, I want women AND men to be respected.

Stats: http://www.official-documents.co.uk/.../5996/5996.pdf

Re: Women
 

You've said it yourself - why, given the small percentage of women in prison as a proportion of the prison population, are they twice as likely to commit suicide? That's a question worthy of an answer.

Re: Women
 

But there are almost 10 times as many men dying? The problem should be looked at regardless if you are male or female.

BTW, the deaths refer to self-inflicted ones, which is what the program seemed to focus on.