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sir_drinks_alot 21-04-2004 00:04

help with my wedding
 
well am trying to organizes my wedding but it's not going to well please can
People who have gone Through this give me some advice

Sipowicz 21-04-2004 00:27

Re: help with my wedding
 
I am tempted to say don't do it, but the wife won't let me!

Silent Wings 21-04-2004 01:01

Re: help with my wedding
 
Depends on what sort of advice your after ?

kronas 21-04-2004 02:11

Re: help with my wedding
 
ok ill give you my advice, im young yes but still if you want to heed my advice its up to you.........

its quite dependant on how much you want to spend...........

first you need to decide where you want it to take place, im guessing it will be a church or a hall ?

then ofcourse you need to meet with the priest/the owners of the hall etc to set a time and date suitable for all parties......

then you need to decide on what arrangements you want to make for guests depending on seating/capacity, if its a church that pretty much straight forward, but if its a hall you need to get togethor and plan the room out, where you want chairs tables etc

then you need to decide who will be bridesmaid best man etc and devise a list of asking people, then look towards the colour scheme you want then to wear

then you can plan for the decorations, depending on how flash you want to go, example ballons, flowers, ribbons, petals sprayed everywhere etc

catering needs to be devised obviously, if you plan on after wedding party for sandwiches, snacks, drinks, up to you, not forgetting the wedding cake :)

hire your cars, limo or something, or you can use your personal transport (if you have some)

all this is money dependant, if you want a visit to the registry office... a couple of witnesses and then your done, officially married.

Xaccers 21-04-2004 06:49

Re: help with my wedding
 
www.confetti.co.uk

Gives you all you need to know.
Join the forums there and talk to others in your position (but try not to flirt with the women on there!)

*sigh* mine would have been in a couple of months

skyblueheroes 21-04-2004 07:25

Re: help with my wedding
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Xaccers
www.confetti.co.uk

Gives you all you need to know.
Join the forums there and talk to others in your position (but try not to flirt with the women on there!)

*sigh* mine would have been in a couple of months

Sorry to hear about that Xaccers..........

My missus was in that site all the time.

My experience was that I was part of a small family, and my wife has a large family. Partly due to keeping cost down, and not wanting to annoy anyone we got married in Antigua.

We basically booked it and told everyone. We said that we don't care who booked or who came, more the better.

In the end we have just the right people (as in - willing to pay to come) inc both parents, sisters and friends. We had a fantastic time over there. When we got back we had arranged an evening reception for all work mates and relatives etc. Just a simple room with buffet, DJ etc. Good night had by all.

I would recommend getting on that website, planning what you want, and as anal as it sounds, setting tasks for you both. I hated getting a task list every week, but it did seem to work.

Xaccers 21-04-2004 08:06

Re: help with my wedding
 
sky, that's definitely a good way to go about it :)

remember, always show interest, even if you're bored stiff, take acting lessons if needs be :D

sir_drinks_alot 21-04-2004 08:25

Re: help with my wedding
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Xaccers
www.confetti.co.uk

Gives you all you need to know.
Join the forums there and talk to others in your position (but try not to flirt with the women on there!)

*sigh* mine would have been in a couple of months

wow thank you for that it shound come in hande my biggest problems are finding some where for the do and the honeymoon i just about maneged to get the money togerher for the hole thing



all future wedding news good or bad will appear in this thread

aliferste 21-04-2004 08:50

Re: help with my wedding
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Xaccers
www.confetti.co.uk

Gives you all you need to know.
Join the forums there and talk to others in your position (but try not to flirt with the women on there!)

*sigh* mine would have been in a couple of months

You got caught flirting with women on a wedding site when you were organising your own.


:tu: :cool:

Thats REAL class.!!


;)

Xaccers 21-04-2004 08:53

Re: help with my wedding
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by aliferste
You got caught flirting with women on a wedding site when you were organising your own.


:tu: :cool:

Thats REAL class.!!


;)

Noooo I'm not that foolish.
We called the wedding off and split up because we decided it was for the best.
I'm soft and romantic, she'd turned into a northern lass who wanted to run a pub and nothing was going to stop her.
We're still friends though, didn't want to lose that.

aliferste 21-04-2004 09:06

Re: help with my wedding
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Xaccers
Noooo I'm not that foolish.
We called the wedding off and split up because we decided it was for the best.
I'm soft and romantic, she'd turned into a northern lass who wanted to run a pub and nothing was going to stop her.
We're still friends though, didn't want to lose that.


Ach well, sounds like it was for the best. It would have been bad to get married and then for it to go wrong.

At least you can get free drinks in her pub :)

gary_580 21-04-2004 09:18

Re: help with my wedding
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by aliferste
Ach well, sounds like it was for the best. It would have been bad to get married and then for it to go wrong.

At least you can get free drinks in her pub :)


Dont chat up the landlady!!

SMHarman 21-04-2004 09:55

Re: help with my wedding
 
Buy a magazine - you and your wedding, bride or similar, they have checklists in them every month.

http://www.theweddingguide.co.uk/index.php

Has lists of suppliers everywhere in the country.

http://www.theweddingguide.co.uk/misc/getthebook.php

Send an SAE and request the correct area and this will give you a good start.

Confetti has good chat rooms, but thats about it IMHO.

Decide on your venue and reception venue and find out when they both co-ordinate. This will normally be the biggest stumbling block finding the places that take you when you want. Then start working from there.

Give all your suppliers as much notice as possible. Mrs H sell wedding invitations and other accessories

www.thesilvernutmeg.co.uk

You'd be suprised at the number of brides that have known the date, time and location of their venue and reception and still leave ordering invitations until the week before they want to send them. She can do them in about 12 working days from proof, but realistically you need 15-20.

Ask us some specific questions and I'm sure you'll get more specific answers.

Jon M 21-04-2004 10:34

Re: help with my wedding
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by skyblueheroes
My experience was that I was part of a small family, and my wife has a large family. Partly due to keeping cost down, and not wanting to annoy anyone we got married in Antigua.

We basically booked it and told everyone. We said that we don't care who booked or who came, more the better.

In the end we have just the right people (as in - willing to pay to come) inc both parents, sisters and friends. We had a fantastic time over there. When we got back we had arranged an evening reception for all work mates and relatives etc. Just a simple room with buffet, DJ etc. Good night had by all.

The only problem with an overseas wedding is that you may be excluding some family members that desperately want to come, but can't afford to...

I missed my cousin getting married in South Africa and I was gutted. I felt it was an unfair demand on those of us in the family who had very little financially. We were being emotionally pushed into something we couldn't afford, because we felt it would be bad if the couple didn't have some family there. I don't think that is a choice we should put anyone through.
My cousin and I are not as close as we used to be and I think that the wedding location contributed to the decline in contact over the last few years.

Also, weddings tend to be far more important to older family members than we realise, one of my wife's relatives flew over from the US just for the ceremony. Not all older folks are that mobile though.
I'd feel very bad if any of my grandparents missed my wedding because I'd made it inaccessible to them.
A local wedding will make things a lot easier from this perspective.

Hope that helps bring another point of view.

skyblueheroes 21-04-2004 10:46

Re: help with my wedding
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by s1lv3r
The only problem with an overseas wedding is that you may be excluding some family members that desperately want to come, but can't afford to...

I missed my cousin getting married in South Africa and I was gutted. I felt it was an unfair demand on those of us in the family who had very little financially. We were being emotionally pushed into something we couldn't afford, because we felt it would be bad if the couple didn't have some family there. I don't think that is a choice we should put anyone through.
My cousin and I are not as close as we used to be and I think that the wedding location contributed to the decline in contact over the last few years.

Also, weddings tend to be far more important to older family members than we realise, one of my wife's relatives flew over from the US just for the ceremony. Not all older folks are that mobile though.
I'd feel very bad if any of my grandparents missed my wedding because I'd made it inaccessible to them.
A local wedding will make things a lot easier from this perspective.

Hope that helps bring another point of view.

Yep, I know what you mean. We both only have one grandparent alive now, and she didn't come. Neither did any aunties and uncles. To be honest, we have not encountered any ill feeling afterwards.

But as our parents kept telling us............its our day - never forget that. You don't want to compromise your plans just to make someone else happy.

We largely wanted to keep the cost down. The holiday itself was expensive, but at least we saw where the money went. We probably only spent half we would have done here.

SMHarman 21-04-2004 10:53

Re: help with my wedding
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by skyblueheroes
Yep, I know what you mean. We both only have one grandparent alive now, and she didn't come. Neither did any aunties and uncles. To be honest, we have not encountered any ill feeling afterwards.

But as our parents kept telling us............its our day - never forget that. You don't want to compromise your plans just to make someone else happy.

We largely wanted to keep the cost down. The holiday itself was expensive, but at least we saw where the money went. We probably only spent half we would have done here.

Indeed - try it when you marry an American in the US. That was the proper place for us to get married, in the church her and her family went to in her home town, but in certainly meant less people came from my side of the family.

We did conciously make the date in October, rather than the summer, this made the transatlantic air fares £200-£300 rather than the £700 plus for July to September.

As her family paid for the wedding it meant that my parents helped pay for my sister brother in law etc to get there, some of my cousins also came, supported by a block of frequent flier miles he had accumulated whilst working in London and SanFransisco.

Was a great day and all the brits added extra days to visit NYC and Niagra and other sights.

Bex 21-04-2004 18:15

Re: help with my wedding
 
i found wedding mags are useful, as someone pointed out they give you a sort of diary, showing what you should have sorted by certain times

...scarily i would have been married nearly a year by now :Yikes:

sir_drinks_alot 21-04-2004 18:28

Re: help with my wedding
 
thank's gang what would i do with you :ghugs: after reading this thread Through the day i headed out to get some wedding mags :Yikes: ones Rachel got her hands the cost of the wedding whant up after she saw loads of stuff for it the thing about my honeymoon is I’ve got to find someone to have the baby for two weeks

Bex 21-04-2004 18:35

Re: help with my wedding
 
personally, when/if i ever do get married the honeymoon destination isnt really a big issue..... it's basically a holiday, where you spend time with the person you love
i dont think a wedding and honeymoon have to cost the earth, it is just a public display of love and commitment

sir_drinks_alot 21-04-2004 18:50

Re: help with my wedding
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by bexy
personally, when/if i ever do get married the honeymoon destination isnt really a big issue..... it's basically a holiday, where you spend time with the person you love
i dont think a wedding and honeymoon have to cost the earth, it is just a public display of love and commitment

that's so sweet i do feel guilty about going away on honeymoon and leveing
my baby for two weeks dose that make me a bad dad

:notopic: bexy you on yahoo im tonight if so give me a bell

SMHarman 22-04-2004 00:52

Re: help with my wedding
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by sir_drinks_alot
that's so sweet i do feel guilty about going away on honeymoon and leveing
my baby for two weeks dose that make me a bad dad

:notopic: bexy you on yahoo im tonight if so give me a bell

No - we just went to Paris for most of Easter week and left our 18 month old with his grandma, well she stayed at our house with him.

You'll miss him / her, talk about him a lot and want to get home after 10 days. Personally I'd travel fairly short haul in case you need to be home in a hurry. When that hurry includes a 12 hr flight that would be a nightmare.


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