Re: World Cup 2006 Thread
 

What I did on my summer holiday
By Theo Walcott


I went to a place called Germany with my Uncle Sven and some other grown up's. It is a country in Europe where a bad man called Adolf used to live with his nazties, he does not live there anymore, Uncle Owen does live there, and the grown up's say I cant talk about the bad man as it will make Uncle Owen cry if I do. In Germany there are lots of castles and some mountains. We are staying in a place called Baden Baden that's a silly name, Uncle Frank has the same name as his dad, that's silly too, his mum must get their underpants mixed up all the time.

On the aeroplane Uncle Sol sat next to me, he got me some toffee and wants to be my friend, he works at the place where I do my YTS, so does Uncle Freddy but him and Uncle Sol are not best friends anymore.

Uncle Owen met us at the airport, he talks foreign, Uncle Wayne, Uncle Steven and Uncle David also talk funny, my mum says Uncle David talks like Orville, he is a duck, Uncle Sol say's uncle David wears dresses and knickers, and asked me if I had ever worn them. Uncle Sol got me some pop.

In Germany the grown ups are going to play football, my grandad says we beat them in the olden days before my mum was born. That is a long time ago.

While the grown up's went to play football so I went shopping with Auntie Vicky and some other girls she bought me a big ice cream and got herself a little one but she said she was full before she had eaten any and threw it away. She bought lots of shoes and handbags and let me play with Brooklyn. She say's she used to be in a pop band and sang me one of her songs, I think she was telling fibs.

I told Uncle Sol about my day out with Vicky and he sulked, then he bought me an even bigger ice cream with lots of hundred's & thousands on it.

All the other grown up's have a girlfriend except Uncle Sol so he plays with me while they go out. Uncle Sven says I must keep Uncle Sol happy, that's why I got taken on holiday.

The grown up's went to play Football against somebody called Sweden, Uncle Sol was crying as Uncle Freddy played for them and would not talk to him. Uncle Sol bought me lots of toffee today and some crisps. Uncle Sven is from Sweden and I heard him on the phone to their boss last night. Uncle Michael hurt his knee and had to go home to his mum for a plaster. Uncle Peter is a giant, a proper giant like you see in books, he is rubbish at football though.

Uncle Wayne had a sore toe at the start of out holiday but it got better so they let him play football. Uncle Sol got me a present but I do not like it. He says all Germans wear leather underpants and I should while we are here, they are too tight for me.


All the grown up's started to call Uncle Wayne a potato head who stood on somebodys spuds. He got shouted at by the referee. They are all saying that we have to go home now. Uncle Sol was crying again and I had to sit on his knee to make him stop. He had his mobile phone in his pocket, I think.

Re: World Cup 2006 Thread
 

:LOL:

Re: World Cup 2006 Thread
 

How could I have forgotten about this gem from Pleat last night until now..

"Isn't it lovely to see a pair of strikers playing with each other"

Breaking World Cuo News
 

**Breaking News**

It's alleged that one of the Portuguese football players failed a drugs and alcohol test after the match. If this is confirmed as positive, under FIFA rules, paragraph 6 sub section 2e, Portugal will forfeit the quarter final match and England will play France in the Semi Final on Wednesday.


Full transcript:




















































Carlsberg do not make forum posts, but if they did they would probably be the best posts in the world! :D

Re: World Cup 2006 Thread
 

MORE BREAKING NEWS:

The jury in the Saddam Hussain trial in Baghdad have found the former
dictator guilty on all counts.

The judge said that due to the severity of his crimes, he will be executed
by firing squad, and that due to his high status as an ex-president, he can
name his own firing squad.












He has asked for Gerrard, Lampard , Carragher, Beckham †¦âââ €šÂ¬Ã‚¦Ãà ƒâ€šÃ‚¢ÃƒÂ¢Ã¢â‚¬Å¡Ã‚¬Ã ¡Ãƒâ€šÃ‚¦ÃƒÆ’¢â ¡Ãƒâ€šÃ‚¬Ãƒâ€šÃ‚¦ÃƒÂ¢Ã ƒÂ¢Ã¢â‚¬Å¡Ã‚¬Ã‚¦ †¦âââ €šÂ¬Ã‚¦Ãà ƒâ€šÃ‚¢ÃƒÂ¢Ã¢â‚¬Å¡Ã‚¬Ã ¡Ãƒâ€šÃ‚¦ÃƒÆ’¢â ¡Ãƒâ€šÃ‚¬Ãƒâ€šÃ‚¦

Re: Breaking World Cuo News
 

You jest, but wait 'till someone at Carlsberg see this...

Re: World Cup 2006 Thread
 

Re: World Cup 2006 Thread
 

the daily mirror is reporting that the germany/italy match finished 0-0.

sounds like something football manager 06 would do

Re: World Cup 2006 Thread
 

What a cheating little sod Ronaldo is, diving theatrically to try and get a penalty :knock: I quite like the fact that everytime he gets the ball the crowd boo's like it's a Christmas Panto :LOL: All in all I hope France beat them :tu:

Re: World Cup 2006 Thread
 

Least he didn't get it, unlike that cheating little sod Owen in the last world cup.

He played well tonight, seems like he thrives on the boos.

Re: World Cup 2006 Thread
 

i think that game was summed up when portugal had a great chance to score and, instead of attacking the ball, 2 players chose to dive instead.

to be fair to portugal, you won't win a world cup if you play with 3 rubbish forwards

now if you would all excuse me, i'm just going to check on google to find out what "shmow" is

Re: World Cup 2006 Thread
 

True about Owen, I want to slap players who dive as it's just not sporting and is just blatant cheating. I'm glad France won anyway as I tipped them to win the World Cup. Ronaldo always looks like he is on the verge of crying and I bet he was the school snitch when he was younger, you know the kind that was always running to the teacher to tell tales......

Re: World Cup 2006 Thread
 

he probably just ran a few yards and then jumped on the floor claiming he was pushed over

Re: World Cup 2006 Thread
 

Crying when you've been knocked out of the world cup? Wouldn't get big tough English men doing that would you?






https://www.cableforum.co.uk/images/...2006/07/17.jpg

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;)

Re: World Cup 2006 Thread
 

Although it was nice to get the opportunity ;) :PP: