View Full Version : Time to get married
Recently I have been talking to friends and many of them are getting married.
Weddings seem to be popular in the summer.
OrangeBird seems to be getting married too so good luck to her.
Anyway, my question is to those who are married already or who are thinking about getting married.
How long do you think you should be together before popping the question to get married ?
Some people say years and some people say just a few months.
Would you think it's better to get things sorted quickly to show your love and commitment or wait and see if you truly get on together ?
How many years would you stay dating before getting married ?
It varies so much... you've just gotta go with when it feels right. Personally I got married almost a year ago after we'd been together about 10 years, living together about 3.
I'd say there is no need to rush. I got married after being together nine years and living together for 4. We didn't make a big deal of it either. We had two guests, and informed our parents after the deed ;)
I'm sure others will think differently.
I guess everyone is different and should take their own time.
Sometimes I think I'd love to get married as soon as I could, but then again building up time together before gettting married is also something I'd like to do.
I guess what would worry me is that I want to get married for life and would not want to look back in a few years and realise I made a mistake and divorce.
fireman328
09-08-2006, 15:17
Dont go !!!!!! its a trap (lol)
gaffer_gump
09-08-2006, 15:19
Why not just go up to a total stranger as that is what the new spouse will become anyway and just give them half of everything you own, house / money / car / pension, then move into a flat that is way to small and fall out with half your family and friends.
Do it now and save yourself the bother of yrs of back bitting and sleeping with one eye open incase they try and do a ice pick job on you in the night..
Some of you may think I am bitter and twisted... :PP:
And you would be correct. lol
I guess everyone is different and should take their own time.
Sometimes I think I'd love to get married as soon as I could, but then again building up time together before gettting married is also something I'd like to do.
I guess what would worry me is that I want to get married for life and would not want to look back in a few years and realise I made a mistake and divorce.
Take your time.Save up your money,get secure jobwise and homewise and then see where you are.Be young while you can.I knew my husband for 4 years before we married..been married 34 years last month.We didn't marry until I had completed all my education and he had finished all his training and both had jobs.
To be honest only you can decide.Yes it's a risk but life is a risk anyway.The thing is to try and be sure that you could spend 5+,10+,20+ etc with the SAME person.If you can then go for it.IF you have ANY doubts don't get married.:erm:
monkey2468
09-08-2006, 16:13
I have been with my wife for 9 years, and married for 2 of them. We had been living together for 7 years, and a year before we got married we bought a house and had our 1st child. So really getting married was just an expensive formality. (in my eye's)(hope the wife doesn't read this!!)
spiderplant
09-08-2006, 20:30
We were together 8 years before she asked.
Can't imagine what took her so long
in my opinion there are a few things you need to do before you decide.
think long and hard about what it is you want out of the relationship, you need to 'feel' each other out, ask about children, the future, etc
you need to share common ground
the other thing is live together before you propose, seriously living with each other is totally diffarent to just 'meeting up' there can be alot of diffarences between how two people are percieved as living, one can be messier than the other, annoying habits, poor hygene :D
make sure you have been together for a while, id say anything over 2-3 years is acceptable, anything less your asking for trouble.
and whatever you do, do NOT have a child too early, in a relationship, it just messes things up alot easier..
timewarrior2001
09-08-2006, 21:14
its all down to mthe people involved.
There is no right time.
I proposed after 6 months, whilst on holiday in Zante. That was 2003. I got married on 10th June this year. We met on t'internet and have never argued with each other.
I know poeple that hav elived together for over 10 years got married and divorced within a year.
Its a commitment, dont do it unless you want it, not because you feel its trendy to do it.
Speak to your partner, after all, you dont have to surprise her with the question.
Just hope t'missus don't see this. :erm:
Just hope t'missus don't see this. :erm:
PM sent :rofl: :p:
Why not just go up to a total stranger as that is what the new spouse will become anyway and just give them half of everything you own, house / money / car / pension
I will email you my address ;) lol
Each to there own what works for one couple may not work for the next, there is never a right or wrong way to getting married
there is always arranged marriage, you just tough it out, for the rest of yor life :erm:
Just hope t'missus don't see this. :erm:
:wavey: :angel:
Total time from, First Met >> First Date >> Married >> First Daughter Born, was 22 months.
How long do you th, ink you should be together before popping the question to get married ?
Some people say years and some people say just a few months.
Would you think it's better to get things sorted quickly to show your love and commitment or wait and see if you truly get on together ?
How many years would you stay dating before getting married ?
I am not married, nor am I (at the moment) planning to get married, but I've known enough people who are married to feel I can answer this.
Put simply, the right length of time depends on the people involved.
One of my friends went to Ibiza, met a woman. A month later, she had moved into his house. 6 years later, they are happily married, and have a daughter. Similarly, another friend met a new bloke. Within three months, she had bought a house with him, and was planning to marry him. Within eight months, she had split from him.
Similarly, I know people who lived together for years, got married and split. I also know people who lived together for years, got married, and years later are still happily married.
If you meet the right woman, believe me, you'll know.
Strzelecki
10-08-2006, 00:06
We've been together for 5 years and lived together for the last 3 and we're getting married on the 1st September this year, 22 days and 11 hours to go! Getting married on my fiancees (never sure about how many e's go in there!) birthday so I only have 1 date to forget.....er remember:D. As for timing, welll I guess it 'just felt right'!
Live together first, say 3 years. If it works out get hitched, if it doesnt, nowt lost.
7 years with my young lady so far.
still happily ignoring any hints of getting married.
i just dont see the point.
zing_deleted
11-08-2006, 08:58
ive been divorced 8 years
Mind you its a good way of getting a house kitted out so go for it you will get loads of cool stuff free if you do lol lol
Met her July95 pregnant by xmas95 married in april96 daughter born august96 seperated march 98 lol lol busy time that was ;)
Recently I have been talking to friends and many of them are getting married.
Weddings seem to be popular in the summer.
OrangeBird seems to be getting married too so good luck to her.
Anyway, my question is to those who are married already or who are thinking about getting married.
How long do you think you should be together before popping the question to get married ?
Some people say years and some people say just a few months.
Would you think it's better to get things sorted quickly to show your love and commitment or wait and see if you truly get on together ?
How many years would you stay dating before getting married ?
RUN, run for your life !!!!!! ;)
in my opinion there are a few things you need to do before you decide.
think long and hard about what it is you want out of the relationship, you need to 'feel' each other out, ask about children, the future, etc
you need to share common ground
the other thing is live together before you propose, seriously living with each other is totally diffarent to just 'meeting up' there can be alot of diffarences between how two people are percieved as living, one can be messier than the other, annoying habits, poor hygene :D
make sure you have been together for a while, id say anything over 2-3 years is acceptable, anything less your asking for trouble.
and whatever you do, do NOT have a child too early, in a relationship, it just messes things up alot easier..
Not really true Kronas mate. What might be right for some wont work for others.
My girlfriends parents met in Malta in september 1981, Engaged New Years eve, living together by march, married the following september and my girlfriend was born the september after that.
They are now still happily married nearly 24 years on.
Not really true Kronas mate. What might be right for some wont work for others.
My girlfriends parents met in Malta in september 1981, Engaged New Years eve, living together by march, married the following september and my girlfriend was born the september after that.
They are now still happily married nearly 24 years on.
im not saying my way is a sure fired way, but i feel its alot safer :erm:
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